One Night Stanzas

The end of TiLT.
Yep, it’s run its course I think. I’m glad I did it, and glad I kept it up for so long. I know it’s divided opinion on the blog — some of you love the opportunity to hear about what I’m up to, others have said they find it a bit fluffy and irrelevant. Both valid opinions, but like I say, I’m glad I tried it. Saying ‘thanks’ for the cool things that are happening around you — however small — is always a good idea; trust me, karma! It’s actually been quite a challenge as well… believe it or not I am a bit of a grumpy old bag and some weeks I actually dreaded Thursday rolling around because it would mean having to put on my cheery ‘what good things have happened this week?’ face. But then, some weeks it felt like nothing good had happened — particularly recently, when both my elderly grandfathers were hospitalised, or when I missed out on funding for my PhD and couldn’t find work — but TiLT was actually like therapy, stupid as that sounds. Forcing myself to find good stuff to tell you guys was actually very useful and grounding. It’s been a weird and wonderful exercise, definitely a good one.
So what next? I am pondering this. I want to do another regular “slot” on the blog but I’m not sure what. Running Read This Press has got me very interested in publishing, crafting and whatnot, so I wondered about a weekly craft-type post of some sort. I am also a big type geek and love Nubby Twiglet’s reasonably-regular Typofiles series, though I do find some of her choices a bit same-y sometimes. I was thinking about doing my own version of that, possibly. Other thoughts: something to do with typewriters (the weekly typewriter? I know The Book Oven used to do this but I reckon there’s still mileage in it), book covers (poetry book cover of the week? There aren’t enough “interesting” poetry covers out there and more exposure for the really good ones might be nice) or small presses (small press of the week? Too much like Featured Magazines?). Or I could channel all my tattoo-obsessing into a weekly post, but I’m aware that would not be to everyone’s taste and it would be less than relevant to this blog. So basically I’m in a quandry and want to hear your thoughts — what should replace TiLT?

Productive weekends.
I’m never happy unless I’m busy — it drives my whole family insane. I can’t sit and watch TV without having something else to do (writing posts for ONS, often!), and nothing “calms me down” more than having a new project to get stuck into (oddly enough). Just as an example… this past weekend, I: cleaned my house from top to bottom (my parents were coming!), read at the last nights of Utter! and Underword and saw the last of the Festival, marauded the streets, watched movies with Martyna and Boy while bleaching paper for the latest print run of You Old Soak, making heaps of jewellery and drinking dirty martini, decorated my fireplace (I mentioned my Mexican candles a couple of TiLTs ago — here are Death and the Virgin of Guadeloupe), sent out a heap of orders from you lovely people, sorted out a bunch of stuff I’ve been hoarding with the intention of making zines and other crafting projects, drank tea and people-watched from my window, and put together the first few copies of “Masters,” the new RT Press chapbook. I am officially a nightmare to live with.

Autumn.
I remember this being in one of my very first TiLTs so it’s nice (and weird) to see it here again. I love autumn, and I am really looking forward to my first autumn living in Stockbridge as there are far more trees here. Apparently there’s also a lively guising scene around here, as it’s a smaller, safer community than you get in the Old Town where I used to live — less pubs and revellers, too! So I am looking forward to Halloween a lot, too (not that I’ll be guising myself… though I have already planned my Halloween costume and it is going to kick ass — but it’s a secret for now). And this autumn I also start my PhD (Creative Writing & Contemporary American Poetics)… I’m nervous but excited.

My new job!
This needs to get a mention, I’m so grateful and excited about it. Basically, up until May I was working as a Lecturer in English at Edinburgh’s Telford College, but obviously the summer holidays started and I was looking at a long stretch of unemployment. Fortunately, I’d saved up enough to live over the summer, but in around mid-June, it became obvious that Telford would be having a huge staff shake-up for the new academic year, and that my job may well (and in fact did) disappear. The past month, I’ve been in a bit of a blind panic — I’ve been applying for jobs left, right and centre but getting next to no interviews. Last week I was offered a job at Blackwells and grudgingly took it (sure, it’s working in a bookshop and don’t get me wrong, that is seriously cool, but the hours were very long and potentially anti-social — ie, full time over Christmas and New Year — and the pay was low and non-negotiable), but I wasn’t happy. Then suddenly out of the blue, I got a call from my curriculum manager at Telford, saying that if I could come in RIGHT NOW, there might well be a job for me. Two hours later, I was officially awarded the post of Lecturer in Literature and Communications, and I am over the moon. I absolutely love working at Telford and teaching in general — after a month of sending out desperate appeals to the Universe, fate smiled upon me. I start on Monday — hooray!

Honourable mentions: Catching up with old friends — over the Festival I managed to see a bit of Jazzman John Clarke who I met at the London Poetry Fest in 2008, and love to bits. We went for a beer and talked at length about his latest adventures (recording with incredible musicians in Italy) and my PhD. He’s a true Beat scholar and gave me heaps of tips and book recommendations to get me started. A LIVING LEGEND, I tell you // Happy meetings. Also just over the course of the Festival, I’ve met/encountered Richard Tyrone Jones, Gavin Inglis, Adrienne J Odasso, Paula Varjack, Andrew J Wilson and loads and loads of other fantastic writers and performers. Check all these guys out, they’re brilliant. // Being involved in the Edinburgh Festival. I haven’t done this since I was in high school, really — it’s all become very corporate and expensive and that put me off. But this year I’ve been really sucked into the PBH Free Fringe (a freaking awesome thing), and my love for the Fest has been reignited! I also read at the Edinburgh Book Festival, which I think will be a life-defining event for me. // Wwilfing (what was I looking for -ing) on tattoo sites for far too long, plotting a new tattoo and dreaming of having enough money for it! // regular movie nights // friendly Tesco.com delivery guys who tell me off for being lazy (yes, I am).

And you? IT’S THE LAST TiLT! TELL ME WHAT YOU’VE LOVED THIS WEEK!

(Photo by Ramparts54)

Gigging. This week I have been a total reading FIEND — and more through good luck than good management! On Monday night I read at The Forest Cafe, as part of the Bowery Book Club, a monthly reading organised by my mate Dave. I read alongside the great Hayley Shields and Chris Lindores, among others — and despite the slightly apathetic festival-season-audience (grrr), it was a good night!
Then yesterday I read at the Edinburgh International Book Festival — yes, really, there’s photographic evidence and everything! I was terrified, but had a good time in the end — I got to sit with Boy and my bestie Struan which made me feel better; I also got to see inside “the author’s yurt”! It’s an exclusive tent full of cushions and couches where all the famous writers go to drink coffee and escape their adoring hoardes. Sadly, the most exciting person I spotted was Stuart Kelly — Margaret Atwood and Neil Gaiman are obviously long gone. Shame!
My book fest event finished at 3.30pm, and within two hours I was onstage again, this time at Utter! I’ve read three gigs there now and it’s a brilliant event — running until Saturday 29th (I’m reading again then, too!), every night at 5.30pm, Fingers Piano Bar on Frederick Street. It’s totally free so if you’re in town, you have no decent excuse not to go! Last night I read with Rob A Mackenzie, Paula Varjack and Rapunzel Wizard. I was very curious to see what Rapunzel was like as I’d heard rave-reviews. He didn’t disappoint — he was absolutely hilarious and a great performer. Paula’s stuff was funny but also hard-hitting and really original, I loved her delivery. And Rob was his usual professional self, managing to link poems about everything from unusual deaths to nuclear submarines with panache! I was also chuffed to see the great John Clarke in the audience — check his stuff out if you don’t already know it, it’s brilliant.
Like I say, I’ll be back at Utter! for the last time this Saturday (29th) at 5.30pm, Fingers Piano Bar. I’ll also be at Underword on Saturday night, same venue, at 7.30pm — that’s also free, so for a night of brilliant poetry and a chance to hear yours truly, Fingers is the place to be!

Plans for the future. The future has been kind of scaring me a bit recently, I’ve been trying not to think about it, until the past couple of days when I’ve pulled myself together and started plotting again (I like plotting. If I don’t have a forward-plan I freak out. Maybe I’m secretly a Capricorn?). Amazingly, an idea for a novel came to me, fully-formed, a couple of nights ago. It’s something I’ve never thought I had the imagination/patience for, but now I’m thinking of giving it a try. I’ve also been banging on about this screenplay I’ve been wanting to write for ages — I haven’t written any drama since I was 18. I’m feeling the need to get away from poetry for a bit, have a break and write something else (because a total break from writing of any kind is out of the question!) for a while. Perhaps I’m just on burn-out because the past few weeks I’ve been working like mad to get my MSc Creative Writing porfolio in, and doing gig after gig after gig at readings all over the place? Who knows. I also want to start making zines — proper one-off types with small print-runs, not quite like Read This. & Read This Press may take a break for a while once it gets to its first birthday (January). I have two more books to produce before then, though, so watch this space! Exciting stuff…

Quizzes! OK, so last week I gave you a tricky movie quiz to do… it was on my Facebook as well and heaps of people tried their hand at it, with lots of interesting guesses! Some of you amazed me with your movie knowledge, though. So now I have another challenge for you — the musical version (which I think is a tad easier actually). If you want to see the movie quiz answers, click here & scroll down! Meanwhile, try your hand at this — see if you can get title and artist without cheating!

1. “You’re built like a car, you’ve got a hubcap diamond-star halo / you purr like a car, oh yeah…”

2. “There’s no light in the tunnel, no irons in the fire / come on up to the house.”

3. “He’s one who sings with his tongue on fire / and gargles dirt in the rat-race choir / bent out of shape from society’s pliers / he cares not to go up any higher / only drag you down into the hole that he’s in…”

4. “Cook me in your breakfast / put me on your plate / ’cause you know I taste great.”

5. “If your head says ‘forget it,’ but you’re heart’s still smoking / call me at the station, the lines are open…”

6. “I was brought up on a side street / learned how to love before I could eat.”

7. “I like to go just like the rest, I like my sugar sweet / but jumping queues and makin’ haste just aint my cup of meat.”

8. “Well you may be a lover, but you aint no dancer.”

9. “Grease me straight down, good electric / I could lay it on the road, mama, it aint no trick / talkin’ ’bout love…”

10. “You never miss a night / because your dream in life / is to be a footballer’s wife.”

11. “At the back of the roadhouse, they got some bungalows / they dance for the people who like to go down slow…”

12. “The drummers and jugglers of Montreal / don’t even exist at all / so I am tearing up these tarot cards and Venetian clowns / antique shops and alcoholic homosexuals…”

13. “Well my mama’s gonna call and say ‘where’s she gone?’ / and he’ll say ‘down the road with the radio on’.”

14. “You and I are under-dosed and we’re ready to fall / raised to be stupid, taught to be nothing at all.”

15. “Romeo was restless, he was ready to kill / jumped out the window ’cause he couldn’t sit still / Juliet was waiting with the safety net / she said ‘don’t bury me, ’cause I’m not dead yet’…”

You know where the comments box is!

(Photo by StaRdixa)

A while ago I set up a little vintage store, got all excited about it… and then proceeded to neglect it! However, I finally took the time to list a bunch of new stuff there so check it out!

New stuff includes a pair of gorgeous shoes from renowned Italian designer Renata, a string of sweet costume pearls, a cute paisley bag and an amazing art deco chiffon gown inspired by the artwork of Alphonse Mucha — sadly it’s a teeny size 8 so I can’t keep it; it’s seriously awesome! There’s something there for every taste and budget so please do have a look — you’ll be helping me to fund my PhD!

(& because I’m super-nice, I’m extending the August Read This Magazine offer to include any order from Edinburgh Vintage as well as orders from the ONS store! So buy anything before 1st September, and in honour of RT’s first birthday, you get six free copies of Read This Magazine — the six issues of your choice, no less! What are you waiting for?)

Don’t forget The One Night Stanzas Store, my Etsy store, and their little sister, Edinburgh Vintage!

Subscribe to ONS!

The One Night Stanzas Bookstore
The eagle-eyed among you will have noticed that there’s a new link up there in the top-right-hand corner of the ONS homepage — the ONS Bookstore. I’ve been banging on at you all for the past year about how important it is to read published poetry and buy poetry books, but your response is always “but poetry books = huge expense!” I’m remedying this by setting up my own bookstore and offering poetry books in great condition, but with everything under a fiver, always! Right now there are a few collections and a whole load of really good literary journals up there — I’m still adding books and putting the finishing touches to it all but it’s now open for buying if you’re interested in anything! I’m aiming to get a really good selection of stuff for every taste, and more importantly every budget — expect a proper post and ‘unveiling’ very soon!

Discovering new movies.
Because Martyna — who’s a big movie nut — is living with us at the moment, we’re watching a LOT of films. This week I re-watched Factotum, which I saw and loved at the cinema (still amazing); saw Taken (A silly action movie, but a good one!); re-discovered The Matrix (and understood it a lot better second time around), and discovered brilliant German movie The Edukators, which is about a group of rather naive young anarchists who accidentally get into a lot of trouble. I also saw Milk for the first time and it is truly brilliant — Sean Penn more than deserved his Oscar, and I’m convinced this should have got Best Picture, too. I was expecting it to be very shiny, big-Hollywood-biopic style, but actually there was something very rought-around-the-edges about it, it felt like a very quiet movie. It also wasn’t overly dramatic or weepy, and all the performances were brilliant. I feel much better about the fact that James Franco is slated to play Ginsberg, for example. If you haven’t seen it yet… you definitely should!

My street.
Also because M is here, I’m spending a lot more time wandering around my neighbourhood as I have someone to walk and talk with! We have become Peckhams‘ most regular customers, scraping our pennies together every day to afford a cup of tea and a leisurely smoke (in M’s case) at one of their outside tables. We also spend far too much time (and money) in Caoba, the Mexican store — my fireplace is covered with these! And mooching around the Oxfam Music store on the hunt for some good literary vinyl is always a good way to spend half an hour or so…

Memes!
My sister sent me this brilliant meme quiz which really stumped me, and I decided to make my own version to pass on to you. Basically, you pick 15 movies and then provide a quote from each. You guys have to guess which movies the quotes are from. How many can you get?

1. “You’d rather make a record with some Nazi-youth shoplifters than someone you know in your bitter and twisted little heart is a musical visionary!”
– said by Jack Black as Barry in High Fidelity

2. “It may be a joke to you, but it’s his nose. He can’t help having a hideous great hooter! And his poor little head, trembling under the weight of it!”
– said by Wilfred Brambell as ‘grandfather’ in the Beatles movie Hard Day’s Night

3. “You awake?”
“Guess you could call it that, my eyes are open.”
– said by Gina Davis and Susan Sarandon as Thelma and Louise

4. “In Jailhouse Rock Elvis was everything rockabilly’s about. I mean, he is rockabilly. Mean, surly, nasty, rude. In that movie he couldn’t give a fuck about nothing except rockin’ and rollin’, living fast, dying young and leaving a good-looking corpse.”
– said by Christian Slater as Clarence in True Romance

5. “I fail to see my family’s of any interest to you. I’ve absolutely no interest in yours. I dislike relatives in general and in particular mine.”
– said by Richard E Grant as Withnail in Withnail and I

6. “Don’t you see the rest of the country looks upon New York like we’re left-wing, communist, Jewish, homosexual pornographers? I think of us that way sometimes and I live here.”
– said by Woody Allen as Alvy Singer in Annie Hall

7. “Do not drink too much. Do you hear me? I don’t want you passing out or going to the dark side. No going to the dark side!”
– said by Thomas Hayden Church as Jack in Sideways

8. “Valentines Day is a holiday invented by greetings card companies to make people feel like crap.”
– said by Jim Carrey as Joel Barrish in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

9. “It is exactly 11am. At the funfair, near the ghost train, the marshmallow twister is twisting. Meanwhile, on a bench in Villette Square, Felix Lerbier learns there are more links in his brain than atoms in the universe. Meanwhile, at the Sacred Heart, the nuns are practising their backhand. The temperature is 24°C, humidity 70%, atmospheric pressure 990 millibars.”
– said by the narrator in Amelie

10. “I don’t want to cram in sex or guns or car chases, you know… or characters, you know, learning profound life lessons or growing to like each other or overcoming obstacles to succeed in the end, you know. I mean… the book isn’t like that, and life isn’t like that. You know, it just isn’t. And… I feel very strongly about this.”
– said by Nicholas Cage as Charlie Kaufmann in Adaptation

11. “This is so bad it’s almost good. This is so bad it’s gone past good and back to bad again.”
– said by Thora Birch and Scarlet Johansson as Enid and Rebecca in Ghost World

12. “Guys? Don’t stay in here all day. I took the batteries out of the carbon monoxide detector because it was beeping all night.”
– said by Jean Smart as Carol in Garden State

13. “Your fucking father went on a beaver diet.”
– said by Susan Sarandon as Kitty in Romance & Cigarettes

14. “Percussionist Foster Grant…”
– said by Tom Everett Scott as Guy the Drummer in That thing you do!

15. “Have I made myself clear?”
“As an unmuddied lake, Fred. As clear as an azure sky of deepest summer. You can rely on me, Fred.”
– said by Malcolm McDowell as Alex de Large in A Clockwork Orange

What are you loving this week?

marry me, originally uploaded by lifelovepaper.

August 2008
How To Find Yourself A Good Pen Name
How to get started: Publishing in Magazines
Submitting to Magazines: A Checklist
Featured Magazines: New Leaf, Open Wide & The Delinquent

September 2008
Rejection Therapy & Dealing with rejection fallout.
The Importance of the Cover Letter
Poets’ Tea Party
Writing A Good Bio
Know Your Writes: Protecting Your Poems From Copyright Infringement
10 Commandments: What to Avoid When Submitting Your Poems
How to write a poem RIGHT NOW
Myths Busted: 10 Poetic Untruths You’ll Probably Have Heard
Quit Procrastinating!
How Do I Know When I’m Ready To Publish My Work?
What’s The Deal With Poetry Readings, “I want to read my poetry in front of an audience, but I’m terrified!” & How to prepare for a poetry reading.
Do I Need A Creative Writing Qualification?
To blog or not to blog?
If you don’t read, you will never be successful
Writing in the face of adversity
Useful advice from writers and editors
Dealing with negative criticism
Featured Magazines: The Beat, Pomegranate, Brittle Star & Spark Bright
Featured Poets: Chris Lindores

October 2008
Poetry Readings: Prepare to Preamble!
A closer look at pen names
The Lowdown on Poetry Contests: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Poets’ Corner #1
A Celebration of Spoken Word
Unlikely Places To Find Inspiration: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Scary Books
Am I Ready To Workshop?
Poets’ Halloween Party…
Featured Magazines: Gloom Cupboard, Tontine, New Magazine, Clearfield Review & Bolts of Silk
Featured Poets: Heather Schimel (now Heather Bell!), Eric Hamilton, Hayley Shields

November 2008
Who’s your secret literary crush?
Youth really can = success, even in poetry!
5 common spelling and grammar mistakes you MUST stop making!
You don’t choose your literary heroes, they choose YOU!
How to set up your own poetry workshop
How to bag a creative job
Read This Magazine Turns 1!
Do NOT ban words from your poetic vocabulary!
Famous first words
“Why are my poems always rejected?”
When poetry readings go bad…
Review: Nothing Unrequited Here, by Heather Bell
“Help! My family don’t want me to be a writer!”
Featured Magazines: Read This Magazine, Bottom of the World
Books That Matter
Inspiration Tips
Featured Poets: William Soule, Amanda McLoughlin, Simon Freedman

December 2008
Constructive Criticism: poetry you don’t actually like…
How to write a great literary CV
Is a songwriter just another kind of poet?
Poets’ Corner #2
Christmas Presents for Poets!
Writerly traditions: the typewriter
When poetry readings go bad… continued!
Inspiration Tips: Writing at Christmas
What’s the deal with self publishing?
New Year’s Resolutions for Poets
2008, The Best Of: Part 1, Part 2, & In 2008, i…
Inspiration Tips: 10 Small Actions To Increase Your Creativity
“Can you recommend a good journal for 2009?”
Taking the plunge: sharing your work with others.
Making a to-do list for 2009
Featured Magazines: a handful of stones
Featured Poets: Lucy Baker, McGuire, Wendy Kwok, Josh Seigal

January 2009
How to make friends with Procrastination
Writerly Traditions: The Writer’s Circle
How to make the most out of your writers’ group
10 things an emerging poet should do every day
Read This Press and the One Night Stanzas Tip Jar are born
10 poetry-related things you should do in 2009
5 more spelling and grammar mistakes you MUST stop making!
Poets’ Corner #3
Words that should be banned!
Five ways to beat Blue Monday
Five weird and wonderful movies about writers (& your picks!)
Songs about books and writing
Writing through crazy times.
Books That Matter: your picks
10 Commandments: How NOT to conduct yourself in a workshop!
Featured Poets: Shirla White, Tom Rendell, Kinga Bryzek, Char Runcie

February 2009
How to take a good author photo
Poets for the uninitiated, Part 1
Poets’ Corner #4
How to write a poem for your Valentine
Inspiration Tips: Anti-Valentines
One Night Stanzas Spotlight: Bolts of Silk
How to write to a theme.
An introduction to Visual Poetry
10 things you need to know about being a published poet.
How to write… a sestina.
Read This Press presents: Skin Deep
Featured Magazines: Dash Literary Journal
Featured Poets: Wade Redfearn, Juliet M Wilson, Richard Wink, Amy Blakemore

March 2009
How to be a greener poet
Review: Tomorrowland by Howard Good
Read This Press presents: You Old Soak (& more)
Favourite Poems from Youtube: Taylor Mali
Favourite Poems from Youtube: Rives
Some tips on reading your poetry aloud
One Night Stanzas podcasted!
Favourite Poems from Youtube: George Watsky
Poets’ Corner #5
The yound Scottish poets “problem”: some possible steps
Featured Magazines: The Glasow Review
Featured Poets: Ryan Lamon, Morganne Couch, Roger Cornish, Cindy Emch

April 2009
Favourite Poems from Youtube: Sarah Kay
How to get a regret-free literary tattoo: Part 1 & Part 2
How to be a nice guy (or girl) in the poetry world
Guest Post: Writers and Depression
ONS Etsy Finds #1
Favourite Poems from Youtube: Your picks
Found online: Cheryl Maddalena
Guest Post: Writers to Read — Bukowski
Featured Poets: Matt Raue, Kate Sloan, Phoebe Salzman Cohen, Michael Lee Johnson

May 2009
Dear Editor… how to keep poets on side!
Favourite Poems from Youtube: Billy Collins
Found online: Sue Vickerman
Guest Post: Writers to Read — Billy Collins
Common mistakes young poets make online
Reasons to love… Carol Ann Duffy
Favourite Poems from Youtube: Great Performances
Poets’ Corner #6
How to get a regret-free literary tattoo: Part 3
Favourite Poems from Youtube: The Beat Generation
Featured Magazines: Form.Reborn, 13 Myna Birds
Featured Poets: Alex Williamson, Mandy Maxwell, Weston T Holder

June 2009
Favourite Poems from Youtube: Rachel McKibbens
How to get a regret-free literary tattoo: Part 4
The secret to writing a nice rejection letter
Favourite Poems from Youtube: Scroobius Pip
Found online: Patricia Young
Writers to Read: Allen Ginsberg
ONS Etsy Finds #2: Ampersands
ONS hosts the Ambulance Box
What’s in a poet’s bag?
ONS hosts the Opposite of Cabbage
Featured Magazines: The Cadaverine
Meet the typewriters…
Featured Poets: Suzannah Evans, John Ecko, Kerri Ni Dochartaigh, Christian Ward

July 2009
Poets’ Corner #7
10 commandments: what NOT to do at a poetry reading!
Found online: Joanne McKay
What’s your favourite word?
Words of wisdom from Allen Ginsberg
15 Books That Have Stuck
Read This Press presents: Sharks Don’t Sleep
A few people to follow on Twitter…
How to be a poetry ninja
Featured Poets: Rowena Knight, Eddie Turnstyle, Dunja Nedic, Jess Winch

Here’s to another great year of ONS!

(Photo by Galessa’s Plastics)

Don’t forget The One Night Stanzas Store, my Etsy store, and their little sister, Edinburgh Vintage!

Subscribe to ONS!

The La De Dahs. Just read my first gig at Utter!, and closing the show were these brilliantly talented London-based ladies. They perform traditional 1940s and 50s songs by artists like the Andrews Sisters, but they also put a retro twist on more contemporary hits — they did a great a capella version of Steppenwolf’s ‘Born To Be Wild,’ and you can hear their covers of Radiohead’s ‘Creep,’ The Darkness’ ‘I Believe In A Thing Called Love’ and ‘Ghost Town’ by the Specials on their Myspace.

Read This Issue 18. Looking seriously sweet. Grab your copy from the ONS store.

Feminisnt. A fascinating and brilliant blog on life inside the sex industry, and what it means to be a woman in the modern world. It pulls no punches… and I’m addicted. Keira-Knightley-style wannabe feminists, look out!

True Romance. Boy has been nagging me to watch this movie since forever, but I only just got around to it… and it’s a new favourite! Weird and wonderful story, Val Kilmer plays Elvis, and could anyone ever get bored of looking at Christian Slater?!

Honourable mentions: Hearing good news re: my students’ exam results // getting geared up to start the new term! // persuading my bestie Dan to come over from Glasgow for a while // new tattoo designs // applying for really weird and random jobs // movie nights in with my sister… back to back TransAmerica/Click/Factotum/Forgetting Sarah Marshall (awesome/OK/awesome/rubbish respectively)? Heck yes! // Utter and Underword — come see me read!

What have you loved this week?

(Photo by JolieNY)

Searching “typewriter” on Youtube to see what comes up. Yes, I really am that much of a geek and yes, I really like finding bizarre new ways to procrastinate. Of course, I got the classic Jerry Lewis typewriter sketch from Who’s Minding The Store? but also some weird and wonderful things like Sesame Street’s Typewriter Man on the letter C, a typewriter-composed song by Nouvelle Vague, The Boston Typewriter Orchestra (oh my goodness, I want to join!), this brilliant moment from Scrubs (I love Bob Kelso!), a homage to a Remington Streamliner and a cute old typewriter stop-motion. Geeking ahoy.

Martyna. Martyna is my sweet, strange friend who I met about five years ago when we were thrown together in the weird world of University accomodation. At the time, M was studying Norwegian Language and Scandinavian Studies, reading up on Wicca, practicing Buddhism and writing research-papers on the Black Metal movement. I, meanwhile, was studying English Lit, working as a nanny, only sleeping four hours a night and writing poems. But despite seemingly having not much in common she became my bestie. We share a fascination for tattoos, old music and counter-culture, and right now M is living in my house (temporarily for now but possibly permanently soon) so we’re flatmates again! Best of all, M has just become the Read This Press intern — she helps me with all my printing, cutting, folding, binding, stacking and posting, and best of all, I can pay her in Pringles and beer. Love!

Upcoming readings. I am on the bill to read at Underword on Monday 10th — this Monday coming — as a start to my Festival world tour! Underword looks absolutely awesome. Organised by the supercool Gavin Inglis, it’s a celebration of spoken word, poetry, prose and comedy and has some great names on the bill. There are going to be brilliant theme nights, including a warm and supportive ‘newbs’ night for people who’ve never ever read before, and a charity night featuring only ‘dirty’ poems! Promises to be brilliant. I’m also reading five nights at Utter!, a festival championing spoken word and featuring big scary successful poets like John Hegley! In fact, I just discovered that for one of my turns, I am reading on the same night and Tim Turnbull and Luke Wright, so I am super-excited! I am reading five nights in all, including the “best of the Fest” night (honoured!), so if you’re in the ‘Burgh, or even if you’re not, get your ass there! Best thing? Both events are 100% free! More info on both these shows — and the other stuff I’ll be catching at the Fest — on Monday.

People who are braver than me:

& this!:

What’re you loving this week?

(Photo by Poetic Home)

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Rachel Fachner has to come first! Apparently, Rachel is one of you secret readers who never comments on posts, so I was blissfully unaware that she existed (if you’re one of these, say ‘hello’ sometime… in this very comments box, perhaps?). A bit of a creative powerhouse (she’s a director, choreographer, writer and general all-round creative nut-job, obviously a woman after my own heart!), Rachel runs the Project: Transparence blog, which is how I sniffed her out! And she’d given ONS a hell of a write-up… it made me blush! Check this out:

“This woman is my inspiration for productivity… there is almost too much to love about her. she teaches poetry, writes consistently on two blogs, makes jewelry, gets awarded grants… oh, and writes amazing poetry that gets published (all the time). my favourite part of her public life is her commitment to hosting, and participating in, the conversation about her art form. there is a transparent honesty about her… a confidence that leads toward being uncompetitive which I find refreshing.”

Oh my goodness, thank you thank you thank you!

Discovering new blogs. As well as Rachel’s blog, I’ve also discovered a bunch of new stuff this week that’s keeping me from getting on with my tasks! ChickenDinnerCandyBar has a seriously healthy attitude to consumerism, fashion, body image and life in general… plus, with a gorgeous old typewriter as her header-image, how could I not love her blog? Blue Horse Poetry is the blog of ONS reader Matt Haigh and he posts his poetry, opinions and TiLTs (yay!) there. I’ve already geeked about The X Files and got bolshy about Carol Ann Duffy in his various comments boxes… sorry, Matt! And sad but true, Book Covers Anonymous is basically bordering on a fetish for me. OH MY GOODNESS beautiful books (expect a post on this soon, maybe)!

The Formula 1! OK come on, I’ve been good recently and not geeked about motorsport for at least two TiLTs, so bear with me. I can’t resist a quick mention of everything that’s happened recently! I’m really not a fan of Mark Webber (I think he’s an average driver and he’s been lucky enough to get a good car… I know that can be the nature of racing, but schmneh!), but I was happy to see him win his first Grand Prix after years and years of racing. Nice one! I’m also not a fan of Ferrari and therefore Felipe Massa figures low on my list of F1 favourites, but his terrible crash during qualifying at Hungary was a real blow for the sport, particularly coming so soon after the tragic death of F2 driver Henry Surtees. I’m glad to hear Felipe’s condition is improving though, and despite being a Ferrariite, I hope he’ll be fit enough to come back to racing soon… not least because he’s been replaced by none other than the Schumachersaurus! (Cue Luke-Skywalker-style “nooooooo!”)
There is the issue of How The Season Is Going, though. Boy had managed to convince me that Jenson was deserving of a Championship title (I have never been a big fan of the Magic Button, but I conceded)… but after his performance at Hungary, wailing on the team radio and sniping at the mechanics, he has totally lost my support! Other drivers get oversteer and hot tires all the time, and they deal with it… they don’t behave like divas! Now I’m backing Seb Vettel for the title, though I think chances are slim. However, I reckon 09 has been the best season for years… great racing, great cars, plenty of suspense, scandal and drama. Hooray! (PS: you think this is geeking? Look out: I have just started watching the MotoGP as well and really enjoying it, plus I’m developing an interest in the BTCC. It can only get worse!)

Tattoo ideas. Right now I am very much in the mood for a new tattoo/tattoos! Unfortunately you need money for such things, but it doesn’t stop me looking into cool designs and getting excited about heaps of ideas! At this moment in time I am really loving punctuation tattoos… Contrariwise just posted a great semicolon, and I am also loving this funky ampersand (and its placement! Brilliant!), speechmarks, and this punk questionmark. Nice!

Wardrobe remix. I’ve been having to explain to people recently why I’ve chosen to do this, and it’s tricky as a lot of people think it’s just vanity. I guess taking photos of your outfit is a bit narcissistic, and I really hate the commerical and pro-consumerist way it’s done on a lot of big famous blogs these days. However, I have a lot of good (I believe) reasons for doing it. One: I have really shitty body image — it varies, but generally I pretty much hate how I look. I’m 5′11″ which makes me rather awkward to start with, and although I know I’m not “fat,” like most women I carry more weight than I’d like. Until recently I avoided creating or even seeing full-length images of myself, which actually led to a lack of awareness about what I really look like. Seeing my wardrobe remix photos has a) made me realise that actually, what I look like and what I think I look like are two very different things, and b) if I accept what I am rather than fighting it, I actually do look better. I was inspired by this lady to embrace and celebrate myself rather than trying to change myself, and wardrobe remixing — a technique she also uses — is really helping. I’m also a big believer in thrifting, recycling, found clothing and second hand shopping, and I’m very much against large-scale consumerism and the buying of ridiculously expensive designer label goods (particularly when you only buy them to put on a shelf, because they’re too valuable to actually wear). That’s why I put the prices/estimated prices of my garments alongside my wardrobe remixes… some entire outfits cost as little as £10, but they don’t look cheap or crap (weird, maybe, but not cheap or crap. I hope). I’m also a bit of a lazy mare and will wear the same outfit over and over and over if I like it. This is making me more adventurous and encouraging me to wear clothes that were previously gathering dust in my wardrobe. All good, right?

Honourable mentions: Boy… off work for a while, and painting again for the first time in years, literally! // Emails from Crazy People, from the makers of FAILblog. This is freaking hilarious, while this — as a teacher myself — just shocked and saddened me. // this picture // Everyone who’s bought a copy of Sharks Don’t Sleep so far — you guys freakin’ rock! // Getting my millions of projects a bit more under control and actually looking forward to working on them! // Driving. Don’t get to do it often, and I love it!

And you…?

(Photo by ~aspidistra~)

Sharks Don’t Sleep The aforementioned book! I have spent the last few days printing, folding, trimming, stapling, embellishing, and sending out copies. This book looks freaking amazing and is truly full of awesome, I’m really pleased with it and it’s been great to work with Eric (and my sister, who did the artwork!) on it. Find out more about it here and grab yourselves a copy here or here!

Wardrobe Remix. I just started doing this “properly” after doing it on a very on-and-off basis for a while… it may seem vain to some, but it really makes you think and care more about how you look and what you project to other people. I’m finding it very useful! You can see some of my bizarre outfits (and faces!) here.

The Bookseer. Wait, you tell this site what book you just read and it tells you the perfect one to read next? Awesome! I tried this and it actually threw up three titles that were already on my next-to-read list. That would suggest it actually DOES know what I would like to read!

Honourable mentions: Getting a new lecturing/tutoring job for the coming academic year. Hooray! // Having my sweet tattooed friend Martyna visiting from Poland for two months! Already my life is full of cool things like visiting tattoo parlours, hair-dyeing sessions and in-depth discussions on the birth of punk. Yes! // Speaking of tattoos, I’m plotting new ones! Need money… // This… snarfle. // Beth Ditto’s Evans clothing range. Love this! // Writing new poems

Et toi?

(Photos by Sarah .K)

My new job at the London Poetry Festival: I am Residency and Education Director, which sounds very important and terrifying, but which actually just means I book the poets to read at the event. In London from 7th - 10th August? Want to read? Check this out then drop me a line! You can also follow the Fest on Twitter.

My new baby. Yes, once again the Boy and I have welcomed the tiny pitter-patter of typewriter keys into our ever-more-cluttered flat. I really need to quit, but it’s hard when Freecycle is offering up such delights as this. It’s a Litton Imperial Safari, and I freaking love it. A few of you have asked where I store all the darned things — I now have eight — and the answer is this: whenever I get new one, I make myself Freecycle/thrift store a bunch of other stuff to “make space.” Four of them share a shelf-unit with my records and a few books, and one takes up the entire chest of drawers in my bedroom. But the other three are kind of tucked away — The Beast is currently in my wardrobe as it is too big to put anywhere else (sad face), my Silver Reed is stuck on a random shelf, and there’s also one of the brood at my parents’ house…

Edinburgh adventures. This past weekend, Boy’s mum and her bloke, Ledger (who live at the other end of the UK) visited us in Edinburgh for the first time. It was great showing them around — the weather was absolutely beautiful and we walked round pretty much the entire city, stopping for many cups of tea along the way! One of the highlights was wandering around a deserted Greyfriars Kirkyard, reading all the ancient graffiti and creepy poems on the tombs, and — according to Boy — getting inspired for tattoo designs…
…and speaking of tattoo designs, Boy got some new ink! I also spent a few days out and about with my delightful sister, which is always eventful — good lunches at Black Medicine, messing around in toy stores and bathrooms, buying brilliant steampunk glasses that make you look like a fly, and dancing around in the respectable Stockbridge streets at the dead of night, plotting a potential joyride…

Finding old photos on my camera I’d forgotten about: minor detail I know, but how cool is this photo?

Honourable mentions: creating to-do lists and then storming through them, Twittering like mad, Allen Ginsberg’s ‘Cosmopolitan Greetings’, getting tasks that I put off ages ago done, prepping for the interview of my LIFE (no joke, everyone cross their fingers, toes and everything else for me at about 11am tomorrow please!), writing new poems, selling a bunch of my vintage stuff!, going on holiday next with with a view to just chilling out and writing heaps, bus day-tickets, cool Freecyclers.

And you…?

(Photo by Re(Becca) Tabor Armstrong)