Posts Tagged ‘procrastination station’

Procrastination Station #123

Friday, April 18th, 2014

Have I really not done one of these since Christmas? Well, OK then…

Seattle gum wall

Have you guys heard of the Seattle gum wall? It’s right around the corner from Pike Place Market’s iconic neon sign, and Lovely Boyfriend and I visited it by accident while we were there. I could only get a crappy phone pic, so I liked scrolling through these cool shots on Flickr… US road trip nostalgia!

“If you’re a woman, writer of color or queer writer, there are probably more barriers. Know that. Be relentless anyway. Strive for excellence.”

If you read nothing else from this post, read this: How To Be A Contemporary Writer, by Roxane Gay.

Sleeveface, only with book covers.

A Lawrence Ferlinghetti poem, anyone? (More US road trip nostalgia!)

“The rape joke is that you were crazy for the next five years, and had to move cities, and had to move states, and whole days went down into the sinkhole of thinking about why it happened. Like you went to look at your backyard and suddenly it wasn’t there, and you were looking down into the center of the earth, which played the same red event perpetually.”

This poem by Patricia Lockwood carries a trigger warning, but it’s completely brilliant.

Scottish Book Trust’s Young Adult Team (which includes me!) have just finished work on this super cool graphic novel: “John Muir: Earth-Planet, Universe.” You can read a free PDF copy — and if you’re a teacher, download lesson plans and support materials — right over here.

Speaking of SBT… they were kind enough to feature one of my poems on their site! You can also submit your story of home.

Flavorwire’s “50 Essential Poetry Books” makes a pretty good to-read list, as I’ve only read 14 of these! Hooray!

Are you a female poet? You should submit poems to this cool anthology.

I enjoy the struggle of making a new object to present to the world, a gift made from scratch—whole, unique, edible as bread. And I want that gift to travel well, packed into an old boat on calm water or hidden inside a greased body diving into a blue pool, a sleek arrow that leaves a feathered silence and wonder in its wake. I like moving, word by word, toward a sense of discovery, toward an awareness of self—a curious, energetic, intelligent, sacred, baffling, depthful, heartful self. I work to find my subject, something I can sink my teeth into. I live for that flaring up of language, when the words actually carry me, envelope me, grip me. And all the above is why I read poetry, to hear the truth, spoken harshly or whispered into my ear, to see more clearly the world’s beauty and sadness, to be lifted up and torn down, to be remade, by language, to become larger, swollen with life.

The utterly brilliant Dorianne Laux, everyone.

There are some pretty sweet things listed at Edinburgh Vintage right now, if I do say so myself. A stunning estate ring, an unusual 1950s powder compact, and some classic pearls in their original display box, to name but a few…

I agree with barely anything Caitlin Moran says. But I agree with this.

The Unfollowed Pie.” Funny, accurate.

If the Earth had rings like Saturn. Cooooool.

I am kind of obsessed with A Single Bear on Twitter. The story of the baby bird a few days ago made me genuinely sad.

Just some rather amazing photos of the world.

WORLD! LONG HAVE WE NEEDED THIS ITEM!


This video of a reviewer playing Goat Simulator is one of the funniest things I have seen in a long time.


Kevin Cadwallender saying it like it is.


This woman is so excellent. Just watch.

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Like shiny things? Check out Edinburgh Vintage, a totally unrelated ’sister site’ full of jewels, treasures and trinkets. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

Procrastination Station #121

Friday, May 10th, 2013

Happy Lazy Sunday!

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: I might be buying a house (I KNOW). One that will need heckof renovating. So I need you guys to send me amazing DIY/home decor p0rn like this and this to inspire me. Check out what I’ve gathered so far!

“We recognize that, in our world, a woman on the road is marked. She has been cut from the social fabric, excised at such an elemental level that when she steps onto the road, she steps into an abyss. And whatever leads up to that choice inspires in us a primal fear. A man on the road is solitary. A woman on the road is alone. This is not cute wordplay, but a radically different social experience.”

If you click on nothing else in this post, click on this article, on why there aren’t more female road narratives. Disturbing, fascinating, beautifully written.

These are super fabby book covers!

Have you guys seen Least Helpful? Really rubbish — and totally hilarious — reviews.

Totally NSFW (not really) hardcore bookshelf p0rn. (And, related: notebook geek p0rn!)

I loved Watsky’s touching post on playing the Fillmore, ambition and keeping on going (NB: links to Facebook).

I know, writers have been complaining for eons about the weight of their burden, and it’s not attractive. But I’ve been around it long enough to know that writing anything good that’s longer than a paragraph isn’t easy for anybody, except for maybe J. J. Abrams. You can’t explain how people do it. Some of the most successful screenwriters, novelists, television producers and rock-opera librettists I know are about a hundred times lazier than I am. They take long afternoon naps, play lots of pickup basketball and appear to accomplish little or nothing for months at a time. And let me tell you, their ideas do not all crackle with scintillating originality.

This is wonderful, and such sensible advice. Now I just need to listen!

The Literary Cat: a Tumblr devoted to cats posing with books. Yep.

Have you seen these wonderful self-portraits of famous authors?

Paper & Salt is super cool: they re-create meals described in great literature!

More stupid things graphic design clients say!

There’s some amazing stuff at the Bitch blog at the moment! I loved reading Five Black Female Musicians You Should Love (I’d only heard of Skin), I Want To Like Hit-Girl, But…, Patriarchy & Game of Thrones (spoilers! But the comments on this one’re interesting, too), and a really interesting take on the new Dove campaign (the video’s at the bottom of this very post! Also read the comments on this one).

Why tea is so magical.

This body language guide from Gala is really rather interesting!

And via Gala, I really liked 22 things happy people do differently and Girl Code Rules. POSITIVITY.

Seeing these portraits of adult entertainment stars with and without makeup was really interesting for me. Totally SFW!

Parents texting. SO FUNNY.

Game of Thrones fan? You must watch these! (Also, Gwendoline Christie ROCKS!)

Glowsticks + waterfalls = beautiful.
A small snippet of Neil Gaiman being fabulous.
Sue Austin is totally inspiring.
That Pulitzer? SO DESERVED.

Have a great weekend!

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Budding writer? Creative person in need of a fun job? Check out the various resources and services at Bookworm Tutors. Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #120

Friday, April 19th, 2013

u.f.o.

A poem! By Kevin Cadwallender! At Bolts of Silk! A hat-trick of awesome!

I love Kim Addonizio, and this is SO the perfect book cover for her work!

I am so happy to see some of Stephen Nelson’s work over at Fit for Work — an anti-ATOS anthology you should, by the way, really check out.

Have you guys seen the Books and Nerds tumblr? Wall to wall bookish escapism!

The lovely, lovely Chris Scott (who once told me he’d “be the Testino to [my] Diana” if ever I become super famous, and I plan to hold him to it) recently took this brilliant, smiley photo of great poet and great bloke Andrew Philip. I really like it! Chris’ work is generally great. Check out his Author Portraits and his Flickr for more!

Life in Authoring, you totally get me through the day, SRSLY. I also just discovered Life in Publishing and Life in Small Press Publishing and now have so much less free time.

I’m always fascinated when Caustic Cover Critic points out how often the same images are recycled for book covers. Here’s a sad and elegant lady who seems to crop up awfully often…

…and speaking of covers, I just discovered Lousy Book Covers. Part of me feels super sad for the poor authors, but some of these really are lousy.

Is anyone else as into typewriters as me? If so, you should check out clickthing. It is basically typewriter p0rn.

I believe I have mentioned before that I LOVE DAVE COATES’ REVIEWS OF POETRY BOOKS. LOVE them. His review of The Great Billy Letford (as he should always be known) is an absolute cracker. But he’s at his best when bitchy: “poems to be printed on Cath Kidston merchandise.” DOES CRITICISM GET ANY HARSHER? A review to cackle gleefully at.

Apparently, “dear blank” is something EVERYONE has seen now, but it was new to me, and I loved it!

Two Beat Generation tattoos! Ginsberg and Kerouac! I approve! Also, I have been crushing on thigh tattoos lately and love these.

To be serious for a moment: you should probably read more bell hooks.

How much do you wish you’d been at this party?

Adverts are often better “edited” — some great examples here!

I can has one of these?

It wouldn’t be Friday without CAT GIFS!

Have a great weekend!

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You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #119

Friday, February 1st, 2013

happy father's day

I am officially obsessed with the Life In Authoring tumblr. If you click nothing else in this post, click it!

I thought my words were spare and evocative and true
Little ominous blasts bursting from staccato notes.

I was really excited to see that one of my former creative writing students, the lovely Daniel Dowe, had a poem published recently by Bolts of Silk (whose praises I have sung here before)! Such a great poem, love the ending…

…and ONS’s good friend Kevin Cadwallender has a cool poem at Bolts of Silk, too!

I am LOVING Stephen Nelson’s new food-related concrete poems, especially the meat and toast ones!

On the whole poetry/fiction thing: if Olds is fibbing, and this is all a big scam, then she is capable of almost pathological imaginative empathy, and worth spending a lot of time over. Whether this is of the I-feel-your-pain species or the look-at-how-sad-I-might-be-maybe is trivial.

I always love Dave’s reviews, and he reviewed Sharon Olds’ recently-Eliot-Prize-winning collection, which I seriously wanted to read, and now seriously want to read even more. Great review.

My hand reached down her floss and then felt a soft touch of her labia majora while creeping through her pubic symphysis.

You think the Bad Sex Award nominees are bad? Check out this guy!

Ms Magazine have compiled a great list of 2012’s Best Poetry Books By Women. I’m basically making it an instant to-read list.

I tagged Helen McClory in my Next Big Thing post t’other day. Here’s her very intriguing response!

HELLO I WOULD LIKE TO LIVE IN ALL THESE HOUSES.

I hadn’t seen all of the latest lot of mystery Edinburgh book sculptures til now. The Treasure Island one is amazing!

Fuck Yeah Book Arts! has a great DIY section full of book-making tutorials!

Do you — like me — hate it when people misuse the word “literally”? If so, here are some hilarious examples from sports commentators. SO FUNNY/TERRIBLE. (Thanks, Billie!)

Maggi Gibson picked out her top 10 books for young feminists!

So, two things have been boiling my blood recently. The first is the whole Christian Ward plagiarism thing. I now can’t quite believe I gave Christian a platform here at ONS, and have since removed an interview he gave here, which was being quoted by a lot of news outlets covering the story. But there has been some interesting commentary on the issue. Paisley Rekdal’s open letter was furious, moving and wonderful, and I liked The Snarkist’s initially-flippant-but-actually-quite-incisive take.

The other thing that’s been boiling my blood? Suzanne Moore claiming that sane people rightly telling her she’s a transphobe = bullying mob, OMG!, and then just the entire the hot lemon-sucking mess that is Julie Burchill. I’m sure you’ve heard all about it and I sure as hell won’t link to La Burchill’s disgusting display of hate speech (still online in spite of the Observer’s retraction, btw). However, there’ve been some smashing responses. The best, for me, came from the freaking wonderful Laurie Penny, and the awe-inspiring Paris Lees. These are women who deserve your clicks, folks. Not a woman, but no less deserving, is Harry Giles, who also wrote a stellar response.

This slide-show of tattooed women through the ages is bloody excellent.

Did you guys see the Shetland ponies wearing cardigans? YOU MUST CLICK THIS.

Christopher Lee: better than you since 1922.

They’re a bit soap-box-y, and more than a little steely, but I kind of like these Rules To Live By.

Need cheering up? Tons of dog gifs. You’re welcome.

Also from Buzzfeed, the Funniest Autocorrects of 2012 made me howl with laughter.


Some brave folks respond to the Moore/Burchill BS.


Jane McGonigal is a freaking LEGEND.


The utterly wonderful Amanda Oaks made this spectacular video about hooping and healing. I love it.


I am also so loving this song lately.

Have a great weekend!

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You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #118

Friday, December 21st, 2012

Untitled

Lovely lovely links to keep you stimulated and inspired this chilly Friday!

Stephen Nelson is just on a roll with his new vispo at the moment! I love these two, and this Zen garden inspired piece!

I CANNOT WAIT to read the debut novel from Sarah McCarry (aka The Rejectionist!). CANNOT. WAIT.

I also really want to read Dora: A Headcase, which may well be in the same vein…

The moral cores of the series are Vimes and the witch Granny Weatherwax, characters to whom Pratchett has returned again and again. Both are feared –Weatherwax’s nickname from the trolls is “She Who Must Be Avoided” and to the dwarves she is “Go Around the Other Side of the Mountain.”

Terry Prachett is a total badass, basically.

In my post the other day I mentioned the GiftED book sculptureshere are some more fabby paper sculptures for your eyeballs to ogle!

Books just never stop being useful. They make excellent insect-homes!

Fan of The Feminist Press? Here’s a cool interview with its lovely founder, over at the City Lights Bookstore blog.

You never know what you might learn about your nearest and dearest if you convince them to be your poetry groupies. I once brought a reluctant friend to an open mic, promising her I’d buy her a pint afterwards. She was so taken by the atmosphere of come-and-have-a-go creativity that she penned her first ever poem during the interval and read it on stage in the second half.

I can’t remember if I posted about this before or not, but hey… along with Harry Giles of Inky Fingers, I helped the great Charlotte Runcie of Toad & Feather to draw up some open mic tips for noobs. Hope it’s helpful!

Can I just say: minature fairy book scrolls.

DO NOT HAVE SEX IN THE LIBRARY, PLEASE.

Have you guys seen these portraits of famous writers “in their own words”? SO COOL!

Walden, or Life in the Woods: UPDATED!

Make a notebook… out of your old coffee cup.

“I wonder what real life wizards think of Harry Potter?” …and other stupid things commercial artists hear from clients!

And speaking of artists… the wonderful Mandy Fleetwood now has a shop! And I particularly love this print, which combines two of my favourite things: tattoos and Joni!

I just jettisoned about 70% of my Facebook friends because of stuff like this!

What if your friends acted like your pets? So funny, so true.

I totally love small builds, tree houses and all other innovative living spaces. So of course, I couldn’t resist including this!

The January issue of Cosmocking is out! Kinda more depressing than funny, though… sadface.

This is one smart seventeen year old.

The evolution of mobile phones (in pictures!) is pretty fascinating.

I am so not a habitual napkin-using kinda gal. But OMG, these!

I plan to look like this when I am 60.


I’m not 100% sure what’s going on, but I really enjoyed this wee stop-motion. Thanks Mandy!


Not as good as the Tumblr, but I still love Texts from Dog.


The Hobbit… BUT WITH CATS!!!


I finally watched Anita Sarkeesian’s TED talk. SHE IS AN INSPIRATION, PEOPLE.


And if you click nothing else in this post, click this. Hilarious, political and important. THIS is how you tell rape jokes, assholes!

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You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #117

Friday, December 7th, 2012

snowflake teacup & saucer

Procrastination Station’s been taking a break these past couple of weeks, so here’s a bumper edition of what I’ve been loving online lately!

Embarrassing admission: I never knew E Nesbit was a woman. I also love this poem of hers.

Speaking of poems by women, there’ve been some fantastic ones at the Poetry Foundation recently! Thanks Chris for alerting me to this one by Leigh Stein, and to Freesia for sending me in the direction of Peanut Butter by Eileen Myles. This one by Bernadette Mayer is pretty cool, too!

Are you a Flannery O’Connor fan? If you’re also patient enough to let this F O’C soundboard load, it will MAKE YOUR DAY.

The idea that there is only one right way of doing English – and everyone else is doing it wrong – is inherently flawed. And by “flawed” I mean illogical, elitist and even oppressive. Judgements about what counts as “right”, “good” and “correct” in writing and grammar always – ALWAYS – align with characteristics of the dialects spoken by privileged, mostly wealthy, mostly white people. We make these judgements based on learned biases, as well as a certain emotional attachment to our own way of doing things. But when people study dialects in an objective, scientific way (which is what cunning linguists actually do), they find that low-prestige dialects, such as African-American Vernacular English or Cockney English, have fully-formed grammar rules of their own that make just as much sense as any others. They are perfectly valid and functional forms of communication used by millions of people. The only difference is that they don’t have people running around telling everyone else to do it their way.

This piece on literary privilege is great (and I’m totally a still-recovering grammar Nazi).

This ‘how good is your pronounciation?’ test has been doing the rounds of the internetz forever, but the other day I tried actually reading the whole poem aloud. “Loth” caught me out!

One of my poems from The Mermaid and the Sailors was graciously published by Writers for Libraries. It’s a great project and you should definitely check it out.

The lovely Mandy is featuring my weird and wonderful sister and her wacky advent creations at her blog right now!

If you live in Scotland you should absolutely take this survey, and be part of the Equality Network’s consultation on how to make our fine country better for LGBT*QI folks.

Melissa McEwan is one of my all-time favourite bloggers, and this is a great interview with her.

Oh, I’m sorry, thin people, for exercising in your gleaming anti-fatness temple, but I’ll wear these baggy clothes and stay away from the popular machines so I don’t inconvenience the real exercisers.

Lindy West is awesome. I loved this article of hers on fat people going to the gym. And in related news, the equally awesome Lesley Kinzel writes about how truly terrible shapewear is.

I now want to write EVERYTHING in this font! (Thanks Mandy!)

20 Things Overachievers Like struck a bit too much of a chord with me… (except for the unpaid internship part, because I can’t afford that. Oh, and the working out.)

…and speaking of lists, The 21 Most Awkward Situations In History is really rather amusing.

Things I love: tea, typewriters, and cardigans.

Have you guys seen Barack Obama Being Adorable With Adorable Children? Prepare to smile.

& speaking of which… TERRAPIN RESCUE!

OK, I’ll be honest: I’ve watched this video about ten times. This woman FASCINATES me. Not just because she’s super super hot, has amazing tattoos and basically the cutest laugh-face ever, but also because of what she’s doing with her modelling and her philosophies thereof. I DEFY YOU NOT TO FALL IN LOVE WITH HER JUST A LITTLE BIT.

A little bit of idealism to brighten your day — and I love the narrator’s voice!

This week I went to see the GiftED sculptures on the last leg of their Scotland tour. Find out more in this lovely short film about ‘em!

Paper Sculptures GIFTED Tour 2012 from Blue Iris Films on Vimeo.

When the wonderful Watsky came to Edinburgh for the Watskyx2 gig I hosted, the Scottish Book Trust asked him to read a poem for them. It’s finally online!

I love the Big Bang Theory and want to be Amy Farrah-Fowler’s best friend. Therefore it stands to reason that I love this flashmob the cast and crew did recently!

& finally — have you watched Kilroy Loops yet? TRIPPY AND HILARIOUS.

Have a great weekend!

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You can also visit Read This Press for poetry and typewriter paraphernalia! Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

Procrastination Station #116

Friday, November 9th, 2012

sock love
How much do you love this photo? Made me smile.

Check out this visual poem by Stephen Nelson. A good reminder to keep an eye out for weird and wonderful things when we’re out and about!

Hey! I’m reading at Shore Poets this month! Come along…?

Speaking of wonderful things: Regina Green self-published a lovely collection of poems here!

Calling all DIY book-binding enthusiasts! This is the coolest idea!

FOR SOME REASON THERE’S A POSTER OF MATT DAMON IN MY CASKET

WHY I DO NOT KNOW SRSLY THERE’S ALSO SOME INCENSE

IT’S LIKE A SHRINE IN HERE BUT NOT TO ME EXACTLY

The Lovesong of J Alfred Capslock wins all the internets.

I love everything about this photo.

Want to record the things you’re grateful for, the way I do with my TiLT posts? You can download your own Gratitude Journal, FREE, here!

Secret tunnels! Ornate giltwork! Plush armchairs! Real trees growing on the shop floor! Check out the world’s most beautiful bookstores… and be prepared to drool!

Tracey S Rosenberg — who by the way has a book launch happening next week! — is hosting her own National Rejection Letter Month in place of NaNoWriMo.

Caustic Cover Critic investigates yet more rip-off book covers. (although, is also rude about Margaret Atwood. Boo!)

It has been incredible to watch people come together in the wake of this storm, to see neighbors support one another, to have complete strangers ask me in line for the ATM if I am okay, if my family is okay, if my house is okay. A lot of people here are not okay. A lot of people have lost so much, and a lot of people still do not have power or water or homes, and another storm is coming.

The Rejectionist’s short but moving response to Hurricane Sandy is really great.

OMG, this might well be the coolest DIY ever!

I have done almost all of these things. Guess the rest are about to catch up with me! (via)

LOVING this synopsis of The Wizard of Oz.

I’d really like to buy these posters for the college I work at.

My wonderful and talented friend Sally was the official photographer for the Edinburgh International Festival this year. Her photographs of the fest can be viewed at her exhibition, FRAMED, on now at The Hub, Edinburgh. Please do go along!

WIN: Tammy Baldwin (WI) is also one of them, defeating popular Republican Tommy Thompson in the Wisconsin Senate race, making her both Wisconsin’s first female senator and the first openly gay member of the US Senate. Said Baldwin: “I am well aware that I will have the honour to be Wisconsin’s first woman US senator, and I am well aware that I will be the first openly gay member of the United States Senate, but I didn’t run to make history. I ran to make a difference. But in choosing me to tackle those problems the people of Wisconsin have made history.”

Liss has made a great list of the various things that were won on Tuesday night apart from just the Presidency. Makes for some happy reading.

This DIY advent calendar is such a good idea! Especially for us vegans, who can’t easily find chocolate ones in stores!

Gum-voting is a super cool, if slightly gross, idea.

[A]s sex workers we also face deep-seated stigmas which mean that if we don’t disclose to you our stories of tragedy and the demeaning experiences we have faced we run the risk of not being believed by you.

This is what we call “tragedy porn”: A desire in the feminist movement to hear tragic stories of hardship from sex workers, and when we don’t tell them, we face the accusation that we are covering up the “truth” about sex work.

This is brilliant. I wanted to applaud at the end. (You need to scroll down.)

OH THE SCHADENFREUDE! White People Mourning Romney is JUST TOO GOOD!

Having taken a bunch of really quite unfair shit from Etsy buyers lately, I kinda needed this post about running your own business while depressed. (via)

I would like this car, please.


Lovely Boyfriend just got an iPad, which is far too high-tech for me! Might try to persuade him to mod it up with one of these! (Thanks Graeme!)


This is absolutely freaking brilliant. It’s hard to critique education without making teachers feel like crap, so well done Mr Godin!


YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

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If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #115

Friday, November 2nd, 2012

<3

Har! Brilliant lateral-thinking literary Halloween costume idea right here!

It’s pricey, but this is one of the coolest notebook ideas I have seen in quite a while!

And speaking of notebooks, here is a list of cool crafty bookish DIY projects for you to try, if your weekend’s looking empty!

We have forged something beautiful together,
in spite of all the darkness.

I love this beautiful, autumnal poem from Kerri Ni Dochartaigh.

IF YOU CLICK NOTHING ELSE IN THIS POST, click here for some WTF sci fi book covers. Amazing! (Thanks Adam!)

This passive-aggressive note got the English teacher treatment! (I also love these grumpy Halloween ones!)

I do not understand—I will not understand, I refuse to understand—why rape has to be on the table for every story with a female protagonist, or even a strong female supporting cast. Why it’s so assumed that I’m being “unrealistic” when I say that none of my female characters are going to be raped. Why this “takes the tension out of the story.” There is plenty of tension without me having to write about something that upsets both me and many of my readers, thanks.

Things I will not do to my characters. Ever. is great great great. A must-read for novelists.

Also fascinating: Saeed Jones on writing the second chapter.

These author-quote illustrations are pretty fabby (though, as with everything, Needs More Women & POC).

The wonderful Captain McGuire WROTE A POEM ABOUT BROCCOLI, you guys!

Looking at [the word 'fat'] as a neutral descriptor also steals its ability to insult. “You’re fat!” “Your observational skills are stellar!”

Everything Liss writes about fat acceptance is always so spot on. The above is from this post.

I had an article posted at xoJane! Everlasting squee!

I love Ruth’s photos of dewy, early morning plants and spider webs.

Next week I’ll be reviewing Patrick Green’s new album, Melodrama. Get the jump on my review by listening to the album in full here!

There’s three main reasons men (or anyone) don’t cook: Not caring what they eat, thinking someone else should cook for them, or not knowing how to cook. All three have different solutions and not one is “baby him along like you’re trying to convince a timid puppy to go out in the snow.”

I so love The Pervocracy’s monthly “cosmocking” of Cosmo. This month is particularly excellent.

Here are some fantastic photos of what President Obama has been doing to help with the Hurricane Sandy aftermath. And here is an article on why he’s a great (GREAT!) president (NB: go ye not below the line, there be assholes). Finally, in President-related news: this. (via)

Want to make your own colourful bird wings? OF COURSE YOU DO.

“Six people battle to save hedgehog trapped in crisp packet”? That’s my kinda news headline.

Food is lots of things. It’s comfort, it’s calories, it’s communion, it’s history and tradition, and it’s fucking yummy. Two things that it isn’t is GOOD or BAD (unless, you know, e coli). And you are not a good or bad person for eating.

21 Things To Stop Saying Unless You Hate Fat People WINS ALL THE INTERNETS.

I love everything in this amazing Etsy shop.

…and speaking of which, THERE’S NEW STUFF UP AT EDINBURGH VINTAGE!

Guys, please support my lovely friend Hannah, who’s doing Movember even though she’s a girl!

It was close, but I think this has to win cat gif of the week.


Look at this amazing time-lapse of Hurricane Sandy hitting New York City — check out 1:02 when the power goes off!

Lindy West at Back Fence PDX from Back Fence PDX on Vimeo.

Lindy West remains my heroine.


This is GREAT.


So is this.

Have a great weekend!

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You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #114

Friday, October 26th, 2012

pumpkin macaron

Procrastination Station has been on hiatus while ONS had a bit of an October midterm slow-down. Here’s a bumper edition to make up for it. Enjoy!

THIS IS GREAT: 10 words you LITERALLY (nooo!) didn’t know you were getting wrong. I want to Pritt-Stick this to all my students’ foreheads.

Received a snotty rejection letter for your work? Rest assured, it really does happen to the best writers!

Check out this cool, illustrated step-by-step guide to Japanese book sewing complete with gif!

Thanks very much to the lovely Swiss for this wee mention of ONS on his blog!

This is deviation:

I had no designs on altitude, knees
flush to the acrylic; all that yellow

was more light than I can speak against.

I utterly love this poem by the lovely Chris Emslie in the current [queer] issue of PANK.

I’m a massive, massive fan of the wonderful Diane di Prima, and she’s sick. She needs help to pay her healthcare bills. Can you help?

Herman Melville says PLEASE WASH YOUR HANDS.

I’m super-extra-mega excited to have FOUR poems in this beautiful forthcoming book, now available for pre-order. Sci fi poetry, OMG!

Kinda spooky, Halloween-y…. mildly morbid. Epitaphs of famous authors.

Point A) “Censuring” is not the same as “censoring.” They look and sound similar, but nope.
Point B) Freedom of speech is not the same as freedom from repercussions. [...]
Point C) Internet anonymity, which, yes, is often a condition of people feeling that they can speak freely, is not a right. And it’s definitely not some kind of Fortress of Solitude…
Point D) People who equate “free speech” with “my God-given right to perpetual access to women’s bodies, no matter how ill-gotten or exploitative” can eat a big plate of Cry Me A River, and then fuck right off.

This article at Bitch is a damn fine response to the whine of “but I’m allowed to be an asshole because FREE SPEECH!” that echoes endlessly off the grimy walls of the internets.

I HAVE A FAVOUR TO ASK YOU GUYS! As one of their community champions, I would love for you to click here and take two minutes to vote for Scottish Women’s Aid to win the Weatherseal Charity Weekend Prize for 2012. They deserve it, they’ll appreciate it, and they’re awesome.

I’m sure you’ve heard tell of the hilarious prank Tube signs that are doing the rounds. Here are some of the best!

6. Challenge homophobia. As a role model for your students, respond to homophobia immediately and sincerely. Encourage in-service trainings for staff and students on homophobia and its impact on gay and lesbian youth.

7. Combat heterosexism in your classroom. Include visibly gay and lesbian role models in your classroom.

Ten simple ways to make your classroom (or hey, any workplace) a safe space for LGBTQ* folks.

This is such a sweet idea… compliment matchboxes full of exquisite art!

A few folk have asked if the Claire of this company is me. It isn’t… but I may soon become a customer!

What not to wear on Halloween.

It is ridiculous — RIDICULOUS — that we live in a society where it’s a good guess that a shooting in a place often frequented by women is going to be an extension of a “domestic dispute.” Anastasia Shields pointed out to me that just two days ago in Casselberry, Florida, a man killed three women at a beauty salon in what the police are calling “part of a domestic dispute.” A few years ago, about a mile from my home, a man walked up to his ex-girlfriend in the parking lot of her office as she was walking into work and shot her point blank, killing her immediately. I think about her every time I drive past there, which is almost daily.

A great, rage-making piece at Shakesville about our society’s problem with domestic violence.

Have you heard about Edinburgh’s cringe-worthy new name?

Oh my goodnessss check out this amazing London loft. Bright red kitchen HELLO!

I defy you not to go “aaaaaaaaaaw!”

Definatalie’s Fancy Lady Industries is having a giveaway. I SO WANT THAT STUFF!

The past (almost) four years of my life haven’t been exactly fun, but the thought of still having that $40,000 of debt, of being so financially desperate that I have to pay an overdraft fee for a pack of cigarettes, is much, much worse than anything I went through to pay it off. It’s hard to explain -– in a good way -– but I feel like I can breathe now.

Paying off all your debts on a teachers salary? IT CAN BE DONE.

CAT BOUNCE!!! (Seriously, click this.) (via)

I so wish I had been at this party.

HEY EVERYONE LOOKIE OVER HERE! If you click nothing else from this post, CLICK THIS! My lovely sister Helen has started her own Etsy store, selling her artwork and crafts. It’s brand new and yet it already contains DINOSAURS AND OCTOPI. Why haven’t you clicked yet?! It’s called Rock Paper Lizard, go give it some love!


This — the new anthem of Edinburgh Vintage, by the way — has been stuck in my head FOR THE PAST TWO WEEKS, so I am passing it on. You’re welcome.


Badass performance poet, activist and all-round awesome lady Cat Brogan has her own TV channel! Legend!


Watch. Be inspired. Act.

Aaaand I can’t decide which of these is my favourite mick-take of all the recent US election shenanigans. Both hilarious, anyway!

Have a great weekend!

*

You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #113

Friday, October 5th, 2012

baby's breath bokeh

Want to bind your own books but think it’d be too difficult? Check out this easy peasy tutorial — and this even easier one — at Fuck Yeah Book Arts!

I’m rather a fan of this “profane calligraphy“!

Are these the worst book covers ever? Photoshopped kitten!

I read Celine. I swim a lot. Swimming a mile a day helps. Any time I spend with my kid sets things straight. He’s a very funny guy and he’s a composer. I listen to his music and learn interesting things about theory from him and that certainly helps mitigate the darkness. I teach in the Bronx a couple days a week, and being up there with my students makes me feel more at home in the world. I don’t know if these things make me hopeful really. But they’re necessary.

I don’t know the work of Cara Hoffman, but I loved this interview she did with The Rejectionist. Great questions, great answers.

Just a few of the Banned Books Week posters, but they show exactly why the concept of banning books is a massive and utterly ridiculous joke.

I utterly love the idea of doing a bookstore roadtrip. Perhaps I will draw one up!

I know I’ve said this phrase before, but this is the best bookshelf ever.

You guys — the lovely Amanda Oaks, of whom I am a mega fan, is LAUNCHING AN UNDERWEAR LINE with her friend Jenn. It’s called Positive Panties (or maybe Cheery Knickers, for us UK folks!), and you can contribute to the Kickstarter that’ll get it off the ground right here. Please donate a dollar or two… or ten, or twenty!

I heard a lot of people slagging the now-infamous Photoshop toolbar tattoo but now I’ve seen it for myself I actually think it’s quite lovely.

Ah yes, because that’s really all we feminists aspire to, funny or not. Forget about gender inequality and patriarchy and the War on Women and racism and ableism and homophobia and every other shitty thing feminists fight against, this is just about having a great train ride and a few LOLz!

I loved this concise and elegant response to Katie Roiphe’s typically-anti-common-sense trolling.

Melissa says, “I love everything about this picture. Everything.” And I agree.

Yes, I’m a baptized Sikh woman with facial hair. Yes, I realize that my gender is often confused and I look different than most women,” wrote Kaur, who is the president of the Ohio State University’s Sikh Student Association. “My attitude and thoughts and actions have more value in them than my body… by not focusing on the physical beauty, I have time to cultivate those inner virtues and hopefully, focus my life on creating change and progress for this world in any way I can.

This woman is a supermassive inspiration and I love her for telling her story this way.

The comments left on passive-aggressive notes are almost always the best part. Case in point!

Once again I am linking to Katja’s blog… but I just love her autumnal photographs here!

I love love love this graffiti.

Tattoos = wisdom? Why yes they do.


This is sweet, heartwarming and awesome, and I want to forcibly make all my students watch it and take note!


I saw something very like this when I was in Athens — it’s A GREAT IDEA and I def want to get involved in some paint-bombing now!


I agree with this man’s EVERY WORD.


I desperately want a house boat.


A short, fascinating video on why it is we procrastinate!

Have a great weekend!

*

You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)