Posts Tagged ‘procrastination station’

Procrastination Station #119

Friday, February 1st, 2013

happy father's day

I am officially obsessed with the Life In Authoring tumblr. If you click nothing else in this post, click it!

I thought my words were spare and evocative and true
Little ominous blasts bursting from staccato notes.

I was really excited to see that one of my former creative writing students, the lovely Daniel Dowe, had a poem published recently by Bolts of Silk (whose praises I have sung here before)! Such a great poem, love the ending…

…and ONS’s good friend Kevin Cadwallender has a cool poem at Bolts of Silk, too!

I am LOVING Stephen Nelson’s new food-related concrete poems, especially the meat and toast ones!

On the whole poetry/fiction thing: if Olds is fibbing, and this is all a big scam, then she is capable of almost pathological imaginative empathy, and worth spending a lot of time over. Whether this is of the I-feel-your-pain species or the look-at-how-sad-I-might-be-maybe is trivial.

I always love Dave’s reviews, and he reviewed Sharon Olds’ recently-Eliot-Prize-winning collection, which I seriously wanted to read, and now seriously want to read even more. Great review.

My hand reached down her floss and then felt a soft touch of her labia majora while creeping through her pubic symphysis.

You think the Bad Sex Award nominees are bad? Check out this guy!

Ms Magazine have compiled a great list of 2012’s Best Poetry Books By Women. I’m basically making it an instant to-read list.

I tagged Helen McClory in my Next Big Thing post t’other day. Here’s her very intriguing response!

HELLO I WOULD LIKE TO LIVE IN ALL THESE HOUSES.

I hadn’t seen all of the latest lot of mystery Edinburgh book sculptures til now. The Treasure Island one is amazing!

Fuck Yeah Book Arts! has a great DIY section full of book-making tutorials!

Do you — like me — hate it when people misuse the word “literally”? If so, here are some hilarious examples from sports commentators. SO FUNNY/TERRIBLE. (Thanks, Billie!)

Maggi Gibson picked out her top 10 books for young feminists!

So, two things have been boiling my blood recently. The first is the whole Christian Ward plagiarism thing. I now can’t quite believe I gave Christian a platform here at ONS, and have since removed an interview he gave here, which was being quoted by a lot of news outlets covering the story. But there has been some interesting commentary on the issue. Paisley Rekdal’s open letter was furious, moving and wonderful, and I liked The Snarkist’s initially-flippant-but-actually-quite-incisive take.

The other thing that’s been boiling my blood? Suzanne Moore claiming that sane people rightly telling her she’s a transphobe = bullying mob, OMG!, and then just the entire the hot lemon-sucking mess that is Julie Burchill. I’m sure you’ve heard all about it and I sure as hell won’t link to La Burchill’s disgusting display of hate speech (still online in spite of the Observer’s retraction, btw). However, there’ve been some smashing responses. The best, for me, came from the freaking wonderful Laurie Penny, and the awe-inspiring Paris Lees. These are women who deserve your clicks, folks. Not a woman, but no less deserving, is Harry Giles, who also wrote a stellar response.

This slide-show of tattooed women through the ages is bloody excellent.

Did you guys see the Shetland ponies wearing cardigans? YOU MUST CLICK THIS.

Christopher Lee: better than you since 1922.

They’re a bit soap-box-y, and more than a little steely, but I kind of like these Rules To Live By.

Need cheering up? Tons of dog gifs. You’re welcome.

Also from Buzzfeed, the Funniest Autocorrects of 2012 made me howl with laughter.


Some brave folks respond to the Moore/Burchill BS.


Jane McGonigal is a freaking LEGEND.


The utterly wonderful Amanda Oaks made this spectacular video about hooping and healing. I love it.


I am also so loving this song lately.

Have a great weekend!

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You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #118

Friday, December 21st, 2012

Untitled

Lovely lovely links to keep you stimulated and inspired this chilly Friday!

Stephen Nelson is just on a roll with his new vispo at the moment! I love these two, and this Zen garden inspired piece!

I CANNOT WAIT to read the debut novel from Sarah McCarry (aka The Rejectionist!). CANNOT. WAIT.

I also really want to read Dora: A Headcase, which may well be in the same vein…

The moral cores of the series are Vimes and the witch Granny Weatherwax, characters to whom Pratchett has returned again and again. Both are feared –Weatherwax’s nickname from the trolls is “She Who Must Be Avoided” and to the dwarves she is “Go Around the Other Side of the Mountain.”

Terry Prachett is a total badass, basically.

In my post the other day I mentioned the GiftED book sculptureshere are some more fabby paper sculptures for your eyeballs to ogle!

Books just never stop being useful. They make excellent insect-homes!

Fan of The Feminist Press? Here’s a cool interview with its lovely founder, over at the City Lights Bookstore blog.

You never know what you might learn about your nearest and dearest if you convince them to be your poetry groupies. I once brought a reluctant friend to an open mic, promising her I’d buy her a pint afterwards. She was so taken by the atmosphere of come-and-have-a-go creativity that she penned her first ever poem during the interval and read it on stage in the second half.

I can’t remember if I posted about this before or not, but hey… along with Harry Giles of Inky Fingers, I helped the great Charlotte Runcie of Toad & Feather to draw up some open mic tips for noobs. Hope it’s helpful!

Can I just say: minature fairy book scrolls.

DO NOT HAVE SEX IN THE LIBRARY, PLEASE.

Have you guys seen these portraits of famous writers “in their own words”? SO COOL!

Walden, or Life in the Woods: UPDATED!

Make a notebook… out of your old coffee cup.

“I wonder what real life wizards think of Harry Potter?” …and other stupid things commercial artists hear from clients!

And speaking of artists… the wonderful Mandy Fleetwood now has a shop! And I particularly love this print, which combines two of my favourite things: tattoos and Joni!

I just jettisoned about 70% of my Facebook friends because of stuff like this!

What if your friends acted like your pets? So funny, so true.

I totally love small builds, tree houses and all other innovative living spaces. So of course, I couldn’t resist including this!

The January issue of Cosmocking is out! Kinda more depressing than funny, though… sadface.

This is one smart seventeen year old.

The evolution of mobile phones (in pictures!) is pretty fascinating.

I am so not a habitual napkin-using kinda gal. But OMG, these!

I plan to look like this when I am 60.


I’m not 100% sure what’s going on, but I really enjoyed this wee stop-motion. Thanks Mandy!


Not as good as the Tumblr, but I still love Texts from Dog.


The Hobbit… BUT WITH CATS!!!


I finally watched Anita Sarkeesian’s TED talk. SHE IS AN INSPIRATION, PEOPLE.


And if you click nothing else in this post, click this. Hilarious, political and important. THIS is how you tell rape jokes, assholes!

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You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #117

Friday, December 7th, 2012

snowflake teacup & saucer

Procrastination Station’s been taking a break these past couple of weeks, so here’s a bumper edition of what I’ve been loving online lately!

Embarrassing admission: I never knew E Nesbit was a woman. I also love this poem of hers.

Speaking of poems by women, there’ve been some fantastic ones at the Poetry Foundation recently! Thanks Chris for alerting me to this one by Leigh Stein, and to Freesia for sending me in the direction of Peanut Butter by Eileen Myles. This one by Bernadette Mayer is pretty cool, too!

Are you a Flannery O’Connor fan? If you’re also patient enough to let this F O’C soundboard load, it will MAKE YOUR DAY.

The idea that there is only one right way of doing English – and everyone else is doing it wrong – is inherently flawed. And by “flawed” I mean illogical, elitist and even oppressive. Judgements about what counts as “right”, “good” and “correct” in writing and grammar always – ALWAYS – align with characteristics of the dialects spoken by privileged, mostly wealthy, mostly white people. We make these judgements based on learned biases, as well as a certain emotional attachment to our own way of doing things. But when people study dialects in an objective, scientific way (which is what cunning linguists actually do), they find that low-prestige dialects, such as African-American Vernacular English or Cockney English, have fully-formed grammar rules of their own that make just as much sense as any others. They are perfectly valid and functional forms of communication used by millions of people. The only difference is that they don’t have people running around telling everyone else to do it their way.

This piece on literary privilege is great (and I’m totally a still-recovering grammar Nazi).

This ‘how good is your pronounciation?’ test has been doing the rounds of the internetz forever, but the other day I tried actually reading the whole poem aloud. “Loth” caught me out!

One of my poems from The Mermaid and the Sailors was graciously published by Writers for Libraries. It’s a great project and you should definitely check it out.

The lovely Mandy is featuring my weird and wonderful sister and her wacky advent creations at her blog right now!

If you live in Scotland you should absolutely take this survey, and be part of the Equality Network’s consultation on how to make our fine country better for LGBT*QI folks.

Melissa McEwan is one of my all-time favourite bloggers, and this is a great interview with her.

Oh, I’m sorry, thin people, for exercising in your gleaming anti-fatness temple, but I’ll wear these baggy clothes and stay away from the popular machines so I don’t inconvenience the real exercisers.

Lindy West is awesome. I loved this article of hers on fat people going to the gym. And in related news, the equally awesome Lesley Kinzel writes about how truly terrible shapewear is.

I now want to write EVERYTHING in this font! (Thanks Mandy!)

20 Things Overachievers Like struck a bit too much of a chord with me… (except for the unpaid internship part, because I can’t afford that. Oh, and the working out.)

…and speaking of lists, The 21 Most Awkward Situations In History is really rather amusing.

Things I love: tea, typewriters, and cardigans.

Have you guys seen Barack Obama Being Adorable With Adorable Children? Prepare to smile.

& speaking of which… TERRAPIN RESCUE!

OK, I’ll be honest: I’ve watched this video about ten times. This woman FASCINATES me. Not just because she’s super super hot, has amazing tattoos and basically the cutest laugh-face ever, but also because of what she’s doing with her modelling and her philosophies thereof. I DEFY YOU NOT TO FALL IN LOVE WITH HER JUST A LITTLE BIT.

A little bit of idealism to brighten your day — and I love the narrator’s voice!

This week I went to see the GiftED sculptures on the last leg of their Scotland tour. Find out more in this lovely short film about ‘em!

Paper Sculptures GIFTED Tour 2012 from Blue Iris Films on Vimeo.

When the wonderful Watsky came to Edinburgh for the Watskyx2 gig I hosted, the Scottish Book Trust asked him to read a poem for them. It’s finally online!

I love the Big Bang Theory and want to be Amy Farrah-Fowler’s best friend. Therefore it stands to reason that I love this flashmob the cast and crew did recently!

& finally — have you watched Kilroy Loops yet? TRIPPY AND HILARIOUS.

Have a great weekend!

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You can also visit Read This Press for poetry and typewriter paraphernalia! Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

Procrastination Station #116

Friday, November 9th, 2012

sock love
How much do you love this photo? Made me smile.

Check out this visual poem by Stephen Nelson. A good reminder to keep an eye out for weird and wonderful things when we’re out and about!

Hey! I’m reading at Shore Poets this month! Come along…?

Speaking of wonderful things: Regina Green self-published a lovely collection of poems here!

Calling all DIY book-binding enthusiasts! This is the coolest idea!

FOR SOME REASON THERE’S A POSTER OF MATT DAMON IN MY CASKET

WHY I DO NOT KNOW SRSLY THERE’S ALSO SOME INCENSE

IT’S LIKE A SHRINE IN HERE BUT NOT TO ME EXACTLY

The Lovesong of J Alfred Capslock wins all the internets.

I love everything about this photo.

Want to record the things you’re grateful for, the way I do with my TiLT posts? You can download your own Gratitude Journal, FREE, here!

Secret tunnels! Ornate giltwork! Plush armchairs! Real trees growing on the shop floor! Check out the world’s most beautiful bookstores… and be prepared to drool!

Tracey S Rosenberg — who by the way has a book launch happening next week! — is hosting her own National Rejection Letter Month in place of NaNoWriMo.

Caustic Cover Critic investigates yet more rip-off book covers. (although, is also rude about Margaret Atwood. Boo!)

It has been incredible to watch people come together in the wake of this storm, to see neighbors support one another, to have complete strangers ask me in line for the ATM if I am okay, if my family is okay, if my house is okay. A lot of people here are not okay. A lot of people have lost so much, and a lot of people still do not have power or water or homes, and another storm is coming.

The Rejectionist’s short but moving response to Hurricane Sandy is really great.

OMG, this might well be the coolest DIY ever!

I have done almost all of these things. Guess the rest are about to catch up with me! (via)

LOVING this synopsis of The Wizard of Oz.

I’d really like to buy these posters for the college I work at.

My wonderful and talented friend Sally was the official photographer for the Edinburgh International Festival this year. Her photographs of the fest can be viewed at her exhibition, FRAMED, on now at The Hub, Edinburgh. Please do go along!

WIN: Tammy Baldwin (WI) is also one of them, defeating popular Republican Tommy Thompson in the Wisconsin Senate race, making her both Wisconsin’s first female senator and the first openly gay member of the US Senate. Said Baldwin: “I am well aware that I will have the honour to be Wisconsin’s first woman US senator, and I am well aware that I will be the first openly gay member of the United States Senate, but I didn’t run to make history. I ran to make a difference. But in choosing me to tackle those problems the people of Wisconsin have made history.”

Liss has made a great list of the various things that were won on Tuesday night apart from just the Presidency. Makes for some happy reading.

This DIY advent calendar is such a good idea! Especially for us vegans, who can’t easily find chocolate ones in stores!

Gum-voting is a super cool, if slightly gross, idea.

[A]s sex workers we also face deep-seated stigmas which mean that if we don’t disclose to you our stories of tragedy and the demeaning experiences we have faced we run the risk of not being believed by you.

This is what we call “tragedy porn”: A desire in the feminist movement to hear tragic stories of hardship from sex workers, and when we don’t tell them, we face the accusation that we are covering up the “truth” about sex work.

This is brilliant. I wanted to applaud at the end. (You need to scroll down.)

OH THE SCHADENFREUDE! White People Mourning Romney is JUST TOO GOOD!

Having taken a bunch of really quite unfair shit from Etsy buyers lately, I kinda needed this post about running your own business while depressed. (via)

I would like this car, please.


Lovely Boyfriend just got an iPad, which is far too high-tech for me! Might try to persuade him to mod it up with one of these! (Thanks Graeme!)


This is absolutely freaking brilliant. It’s hard to critique education without making teachers feel like crap, so well done Mr Godin!


YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

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If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #115

Friday, November 2nd, 2012

<3

Har! Brilliant lateral-thinking literary Halloween costume idea right here!

It’s pricey, but this is one of the coolest notebook ideas I have seen in quite a while!

And speaking of notebooks, here is a list of cool crafty bookish DIY projects for you to try, if your weekend’s looking empty!

We have forged something beautiful together,
in spite of all the darkness.

I love this beautiful, autumnal poem from Kerri Ni Dochartaigh.

IF YOU CLICK NOTHING ELSE IN THIS POST, click here for some WTF sci fi book covers. Amazing! (Thanks Adam!)

This passive-aggressive note got the English teacher treatment! (I also love these grumpy Halloween ones!)

I do not understand—I will not understand, I refuse to understand—why rape has to be on the table for every story with a female protagonist, or even a strong female supporting cast. Why it’s so assumed that I’m being “unrealistic” when I say that none of my female characters are going to be raped. Why this “takes the tension out of the story.” There is plenty of tension without me having to write about something that upsets both me and many of my readers, thanks.

Things I will not do to my characters. Ever. is great great great. A must-read for novelists.

Also fascinating: Saeed Jones on writing the second chapter.

These author-quote illustrations are pretty fabby (though, as with everything, Needs More Women & POC).

The wonderful Captain McGuire WROTE A POEM ABOUT BROCCOLI, you guys!

Looking at [the word 'fat'] as a neutral descriptor also steals its ability to insult. “You’re fat!” “Your observational skills are stellar!”

Everything Liss writes about fat acceptance is always so spot on. The above is from this post.

I had an article posted at xoJane! Everlasting squee!

I love Ruth’s photos of dewy, early morning plants and spider webs.

Next week I’ll be reviewing Patrick Green’s new album, Melodrama. Get the jump on my review by listening to the album in full here!

There’s three main reasons men (or anyone) don’t cook: Not caring what they eat, thinking someone else should cook for them, or not knowing how to cook. All three have different solutions and not one is “baby him along like you’re trying to convince a timid puppy to go out in the snow.”

I so love The Pervocracy’s monthly “cosmocking” of Cosmo. This month is particularly excellent.

Here are some fantastic photos of what President Obama has been doing to help with the Hurricane Sandy aftermath. And here is an article on why he’s a great (GREAT!) president (NB: go ye not below the line, there be assholes). Finally, in President-related news: this. (via)

Want to make your own colourful bird wings? OF COURSE YOU DO.

“Six people battle to save hedgehog trapped in crisp packet”? That’s my kinda news headline.

Food is lots of things. It’s comfort, it’s calories, it’s communion, it’s history and tradition, and it’s fucking yummy. Two things that it isn’t is GOOD or BAD (unless, you know, e coli). And you are not a good or bad person for eating.

21 Things To Stop Saying Unless You Hate Fat People WINS ALL THE INTERNETS.

I love everything in this amazing Etsy shop.

…and speaking of which, THERE’S NEW STUFF UP AT EDINBURGH VINTAGE!

Guys, please support my lovely friend Hannah, who’s doing Movember even though she’s a girl!

It was close, but I think this has to win cat gif of the week.


Look at this amazing time-lapse of Hurricane Sandy hitting New York City — check out 1:02 when the power goes off!

Lindy West at Back Fence PDX from Back Fence PDX on Vimeo.

Lindy West remains my heroine.


This is GREAT.


So is this.

Have a great weekend!

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You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #114

Friday, October 26th, 2012

pumpkin macaron

Procrastination Station has been on hiatus while ONS had a bit of an October midterm slow-down. Here’s a bumper edition to make up for it. Enjoy!

THIS IS GREAT: 10 words you LITERALLY (nooo!) didn’t know you were getting wrong. I want to Pritt-Stick this to all my students’ foreheads.

Received a snotty rejection letter for your work? Rest assured, it really does happen to the best writers!

Check out this cool, illustrated step-by-step guide to Japanese book sewing complete with gif!

Thanks very much to the lovely Swiss for this wee mention of ONS on his blog!

This is deviation:

I had no designs on altitude, knees
flush to the acrylic; all that yellow

was more light than I can speak against.

I utterly love this poem by the lovely Chris Emslie in the current [queer] issue of PANK.

I’m a massive, massive fan of the wonderful Diane di Prima, and she’s sick. She needs help to pay her healthcare bills. Can you help?

Herman Melville says PLEASE WASH YOUR HANDS.

I’m super-extra-mega excited to have FOUR poems in this beautiful forthcoming book, now available for pre-order. Sci fi poetry, OMG!

Kinda spooky, Halloween-y…. mildly morbid. Epitaphs of famous authors.

Point A) “Censuring” is not the same as “censoring.” They look and sound similar, but nope.
Point B) Freedom of speech is not the same as freedom from repercussions. [...]
Point C) Internet anonymity, which, yes, is often a condition of people feeling that they can speak freely, is not a right. And it’s definitely not some kind of Fortress of Solitude…
Point D) People who equate “free speech” with “my God-given right to perpetual access to women’s bodies, no matter how ill-gotten or exploitative” can eat a big plate of Cry Me A River, and then fuck right off.

This article at Bitch is a damn fine response to the whine of “but I’m allowed to be an asshole because FREE SPEECH!” that echoes endlessly off the grimy walls of the internets.

I HAVE A FAVOUR TO ASK YOU GUYS! As one of their community champions, I would love for you to click here and take two minutes to vote for Scottish Women’s Aid to win the Weatherseal Charity Weekend Prize for 2012. They deserve it, they’ll appreciate it, and they’re awesome.

I’m sure you’ve heard tell of the hilarious prank Tube signs that are doing the rounds. Here are some of the best!

6. Challenge homophobia. As a role model for your students, respond to homophobia immediately and sincerely. Encourage in-service trainings for staff and students on homophobia and its impact on gay and lesbian youth.

7. Combat heterosexism in your classroom. Include visibly gay and lesbian role models in your classroom.

Ten simple ways to make your classroom (or hey, any workplace) a safe space for LGBTQ* folks.

This is such a sweet idea… compliment matchboxes full of exquisite art!

A few folk have asked if the Claire of this company is me. It isn’t… but I may soon become a customer!

What not to wear on Halloween.

It is ridiculous — RIDICULOUS — that we live in a society where it’s a good guess that a shooting in a place often frequented by women is going to be an extension of a “domestic dispute.” Anastasia Shields pointed out to me that just two days ago in Casselberry, Florida, a man killed three women at a beauty salon in what the police are calling “part of a domestic dispute.” A few years ago, about a mile from my home, a man walked up to his ex-girlfriend in the parking lot of her office as she was walking into work and shot her point blank, killing her immediately. I think about her every time I drive past there, which is almost daily.

A great, rage-making piece at Shakesville about our society’s problem with domestic violence.

Have you heard about Edinburgh’s cringe-worthy new name?

Oh my goodnessss check out this amazing London loft. Bright red kitchen HELLO!

I defy you not to go “aaaaaaaaaaw!”

Definatalie’s Fancy Lady Industries is having a giveaway. I SO WANT THAT STUFF!

The past (almost) four years of my life haven’t been exactly fun, but the thought of still having that $40,000 of debt, of being so financially desperate that I have to pay an overdraft fee for a pack of cigarettes, is much, much worse than anything I went through to pay it off. It’s hard to explain -– in a good way -– but I feel like I can breathe now.

Paying off all your debts on a teachers salary? IT CAN BE DONE.

CAT BOUNCE!!! (Seriously, click this.) (via)

I so wish I had been at this party.

HEY EVERYONE LOOKIE OVER HERE! If you click nothing else from this post, CLICK THIS! My lovely sister Helen has started her own Etsy store, selling her artwork and crafts. It’s brand new and yet it already contains DINOSAURS AND OCTOPI. Why haven’t you clicked yet?! It’s called Rock Paper Lizard, go give it some love!


This — the new anthem of Edinburgh Vintage, by the way — has been stuck in my head FOR THE PAST TWO WEEKS, so I am passing it on. You’re welcome.


Badass performance poet, activist and all-round awesome lady Cat Brogan has her own TV channel! Legend!


Watch. Be inspired. Act.

Aaaand I can’t decide which of these is my favourite mick-take of all the recent US election shenanigans. Both hilarious, anyway!

Have a great weekend!

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You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #113

Friday, October 5th, 2012

baby's breath bokeh

Want to bind your own books but think it’d be too difficult? Check out this easy peasy tutorial — and this even easier one — at Fuck Yeah Book Arts!

I’m rather a fan of this “profane calligraphy“!

Are these the worst book covers ever? Photoshopped kitten!

I read Celine. I swim a lot. Swimming a mile a day helps. Any time I spend with my kid sets things straight. He’s a very funny guy and he’s a composer. I listen to his music and learn interesting things about theory from him and that certainly helps mitigate the darkness. I teach in the Bronx a couple days a week, and being up there with my students makes me feel more at home in the world. I don’t know if these things make me hopeful really. But they’re necessary.

I don’t know the work of Cara Hoffman, but I loved this interview she did with The Rejectionist. Great questions, great answers.

Just a few of the Banned Books Week posters, but they show exactly why the concept of banning books is a massive and utterly ridiculous joke.

I utterly love the idea of doing a bookstore roadtrip. Perhaps I will draw one up!

I know I’ve said this phrase before, but this is the best bookshelf ever.

You guys — the lovely Amanda Oaks, of whom I am a mega fan, is LAUNCHING AN UNDERWEAR LINE with her friend Jenn. It’s called Positive Panties (or maybe Cheery Knickers, for us UK folks!), and you can contribute to the Kickstarter that’ll get it off the ground right here. Please donate a dollar or two… or ten, or twenty!

I heard a lot of people slagging the now-infamous Photoshop toolbar tattoo but now I’ve seen it for myself I actually think it’s quite lovely.

Ah yes, because that’s really all we feminists aspire to, funny or not. Forget about gender inequality and patriarchy and the War on Women and racism and ableism and homophobia and every other shitty thing feminists fight against, this is just about having a great train ride and a few LOLz!

I loved this concise and elegant response to Katie Roiphe’s typically-anti-common-sense trolling.

Melissa says, “I love everything about this picture. Everything.” And I agree.

Yes, I’m a baptized Sikh woman with facial hair. Yes, I realize that my gender is often confused and I look different than most women,” wrote Kaur, who is the president of the Ohio State University’s Sikh Student Association. “My attitude and thoughts and actions have more value in them than my body… by not focusing on the physical beauty, I have time to cultivate those inner virtues and hopefully, focus my life on creating change and progress for this world in any way I can.

This woman is a supermassive inspiration and I love her for telling her story this way.

The comments left on passive-aggressive notes are almost always the best part. Case in point!

Once again I am linking to Katja’s blog… but I just love her autumnal photographs here!

I love love love this graffiti.

Tattoos = wisdom? Why yes they do.


This is sweet, heartwarming and awesome, and I want to forcibly make all my students watch it and take note!


I saw something very like this when I was in Athens — it’s A GREAT IDEA and I def want to get involved in some paint-bombing now!


I agree with this man’s EVERY WORD.


I desperately want a house boat.


A short, fascinating video on why it is we procrastinate!

Have a great weekend!

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You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #112

Friday, September 28th, 2012

2012-09-21 Kürbisse I

Is anyone planning on getting me a Christmas present? In case you’re stuck for ideas… this this this! (Thanks, Priscilla!)

Aaaand a Christmas present for the OBSESSIVE TYPEWRITER LOVER in your life? (Know anyone in these parts who matches that description…?)

If you want to look thoughtful and melancholy: Wear lots of black. Black pants with a black shirt would be a good idea. Something fun to wear to a poetry reading or cafe is a beret. For shoes, boots or ballet flats would be nice. Don’t go overboard on makeup and jewelry.

I’VE BEEN DOING IT ALL WRONG FOR YEARS! Learn how to dress like a poet in five easy steps! (Or yaknow, you could justbuy this.)

I love this short ‘n’ sweet concrete poem from Stephen Nelson.

And speaking of short ‘n’ sweet — what would YOUR one-line obituary be? (answers in the comments, please!)

Regina has a poem up at Golden Horses!

Avoid cliques, gangs, groups. The presence of a crowd won’t make your writing any better than it is.

THIS! Thank you, Zadie Smith! And your other writing rules are also pretty darned excellent!

A lovely new poem from Mr McGuire!

OK, one more novelty typewriter product which I am coveting, and then I’ll stop, OK? But just LOOK AT THIS FROCK! (Thanks, Ruth!)

Dad, I love your fatness, because your fatness is part of you. Your fat body changed my and my sister’s diapers. Your fat body sat next to me on the couch when I was just a tiny child and watched Star Trek, both the original AND The Next Generation with me, making me the geek I am today. Your fat lap was the one that, when I was a child and computer games were still pretty damn young, would let me sit upon it as you played (for both of us, me shouting directions gleefully), Designasaurus, and, I admit, often I’d laugh so hard that I would pee my pants with excitement, WHILE IN YOUR LAP. And your fat self was ok with it (not thrilled, but it never stopped us from playing again). Your fat body was the body of the man who let me and my sister put scrunchies, elastics, bows, ribbons, and sparkly hair gel in his hair. Who let us give him terrible comb-overs and pig tails, because you loved us. Your fat self taught me subtraction better than I was learning it in class.

This letter to a fat father from his fat trans son is beautiful, sad and brave. Please read.

Gorgeous rainy autumn photos from Katja! (Have you noticed I am totally crushing on her blog?)

I just discovered The Improvised Life blog and now I am in love…

I know I post these all the time here but this might be THE BEST Passive-Aggressive Note ever!

I want to start a clicktivism type campaign called Fire Christina Hendricks’ Obviously-Cruel Stylist And Let’s All Club Together To Buy Her A Cardi.

OMFG it’s a PONYBIKE! (although, did they miss a trick or what by not making it a unicorn?) Thanks Ellie!


This badass 87 year old is kicking Republican butt in the cutest way!


It’s not perfect, but this new M&S ad is definitely a step in the right direction in terms of diversity. (Also, love the fact that one of the top-rated Youtube comments is: “Anyone else reckon the silver haired woman is fit as f**k?”)


I TOTALLY LOVE THIS SONG!

Have a great weekend!

*

You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #111

Friday, September 21st, 2012

blackberries

“What [arts administrators] want to see, they think, is ‘innovation’ in art. What they often reward is meretricious novelty in format, often in the form of ill-thought-out interdisciplinary collaboration - rather than in those forms which have proven their equality to human creativity over five millennia of R&D, of streamlining their design in the cultural wind-tunnel.

That’s to say an apparently modest proposal to write a book or paint a couple of pictures might be a thousand times more ‘ambitious’ than that idea to shave a haiku into a dog’s arse, film the results and project it onto Calton Hill. Real ‘ambition’ is usually a matter of vision and content, not external form, which is purely a means to an end.”

I’ve been super-anti-Creative Scotland ever since the massive waste of precious money and energy (oh and HELLO LIGHT POLLUTION!) that was EnLIGHTen… so thanks, Don, for saying what a lot of us were thinking. (& there’s more, in the second half of this article.)

Juliet Cook, editor in awesomeness at 13 Myna Birds and Blood Pudding Press, is holding a chapbook contest!

My sister and I often don’t read the cards in art galleries — instead, we make up our own “interpretations.” Turns out, someone turned what we do, giggling behind our hands, into a website! (Thanks Swiss!)

A whole ton of cool reading-based writing/thinking/discussion exercises for students. Fabby!

Making connections is incredibly difficult for me. It’s not that I’m shy, I actually really resent being called shy, it’s that I am overcome with panic whenever I try to do certain social/ professional things. When I say panic, I don’t mean butterflies in my stomach. I sweat. I don’t perspire. Sweat rolls down my face, I get flustered, I forget how to form words and I get disoriented and dizzy. People don’t tend to react favourably towards a leaking, bumbling mess, and so I end up compounding panic with the fear of looking ridiculous. And so on and so forth. I only found out there was a name for this a few years ago, and it’s called Social Anxiety Disorder.

Thank you, Natalie, for describing it EXACTLY. That’s EXACTLY what it’s like.

This week’s installation of typewriter p0rn!

I am currently obsessed with reading about new ways of using/revitalising old stuff. This was right up my street, therefore. (Know of any other good articles/blogs like this? Give me a shout!)

… and in particular, I am getting SUPER into DIY craft projects based on throw-away household items. Did you know you can make a speaker, a water-balloon launcher, a wifi antenna, a kaleidoscope, a solar oven or a pinhole camera from a Pringles tube? Why the hell would you landfill them?!

Did I mention that Edinburgh Vintage has a sale-tastic sale section? Also a final clearance section full of bargains? Also I just added a ton of new stuff? And also that I am only a few sales away from 200 and when that happens there will be an uber-sale store wide? DID I MENTION THAT STUFF?

The fetishization of the Geek Girl is, at it’s core, a sexist ideal cloaked in the soft tyranny of “worship” and fantasy. By elevating her to the status of Goddess you may think you are paying her the ultimate compliment when instead all you are doing is denying her her own personhood. A girl who is a geek is a woman with all the flaws and imperfections that come with being human. The Geek Girl is a female-shaped collection of ideas, stereotypes and idealized fantasies about what you want in a woman… only without all of the downsides of being a real person. She has a life and interests, desires and experiences. The Geek Girl is defined by two things: her status as a geek and by the man who loves her.

This is super-long, but it’s great, and I urge you to read it.

Oh my goodness. Can I live here, please?

“Except Graham.” LOVING this round-up of Passive-Aggressive Notes!

Thanks to the many assholes I meet on the net (and IRL), I so needed this to be part of my life. Thanks, George!

OBLIGATORY KITTEN GIF.


OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD IT’S AN ACTUAL REAL WEST WING REUNION!!!!!
(Though no Sam. Sad trombones. But still OH MY GOD! Thanks Chris!)


OK, so this doc is an hour and twenty minutes long, but it’s fascinating. You should absolutely totally watch it.


I really, really, really admire Jane McGonigal.


Total nostalgiafest. I love Queen Latifah and I AM NOT SORRY!

Have a great weekend!

*

You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)

Procrastination Station #110

Friday, September 14th, 2012

Some biology book

Right before I left the States for Europe, I dyed my hair bright red. In a poetry workshop at Cave Canem, Nikki Finney asked the other poets to describe the color of my hair as specifically as possible. Red like paprika, like Kool-Aid, like burnt sienna, like rust… I carry these colors in my head like memories of past lives.

This piece, by Saeed Jones, is really excellent. All about appearance, identity, race, place and loss. Fabulous.

Want to be able to read lying down without getting neck-strain or having all the blood run out of your arms? Now you can… as long as you don’t mind looking daft.

This tutorial on how to make your own small notebook is really cool.

OMG this is a newly-found photograph of (probably) Emily Dickinson! …and speaking of Emily Dickinson: O M G !!!

“Around 11:00PM I received 3 different calls, all blocked, with one leaving a “delete your review!” voicemail and the second stating that I should just kill myself for being such a miserable person for attacking poor Emily. REALLY? And yes, I’m talking with the cops about this already. I mean that’s Misery kind of fan territory. Not long after I heard a loud bang on my deck and I was legitimately scared that it was a gunshot. Far fetched maybe but this was quickly sinking into WTF territory.”

This girl received death threats for writing an Amazon review… and the novelist felt this was pretty OK. I’ve never heard of Emily Giffin but I am sure as hell boycotting her every book after this!

A peek inside the Sketchbooks of the Pros.

Got puns? You do now!

The world’s most beautiful literary magazines — and I’ve been published in one of them! Woo!

You’re thinking about skipping over this one without clicking because it’s called How To Use Google Search More Effectively, aren’t you? DON’T, I BEG YOU. It blew my tiny little mind.

98% of everything I own is second hand. My blow dryer, my picture frames, my sheets (not as gross as you’re imagining). They cost a fraction of what I’d pay for them new, and no one’s the wiser. At least until I tell the internet that I sleep on used sheets.

ME TOO, LADY. And all the other advice listed here is bloody excellent, too.

I contributed to this IdeasMag article on how to make a good impression in your University application. If you’re a prospective student, check it out!

Katja’s meditations make me want to say thank you for more stuff. So, thank you, Katja, for your blog. It’s awesome.

Allow me to teach you a new word.

OMG Starbucks bans screenwriters! So funny!

Yes, I was scared at times, but I had also been scared sitting on my futon watching “The Real World.” (Scared of the phone, scared of the future, scared of what people said about me.) The far more terrifying fate, as I saw it, was that I would fail to become the person I wanted to be. I still wasn’t sure what that was yet. I spent much of those five months feeling like a kite dangling on a string. Was I going to head to grad school? Write for television? Open my own school? My mind filled with clouds. But my God, it was fun. It was boring, too. I took eight-hour hikes and let my mind wander, or sang the “Xanadu” soundtrack for the 18 billionth time.

Why every woman should travel alone chipped quite a big block off my terror at the thought of doing just that.

I was chuffed to come across this database of great vegan cookery zines.

…and speaking of which, I am officially a disciple of the goddess Isa Chandra Moskowitz, and her guide to vegan activism is AWESOME.

Political Facebook discussions. So awful. So true.
(I harbour a special resentment for “The Thoughtful One.”)

I am neither an empty man-socket nor a fucking venus flytrap. I am not looking to “attract a man.” I am just trying to do my stuff and then maybe meet a person who likes me because I am also a person. I didn’t want to get all serious right off the bat, BUT SORRY: Women’s grueling, lifelong, losing battle to transform themselves into magical, flawless creatures with Disney hair and 15-inch waists and massive ham-lips is not for the benefit of women. And when men say that they “love to see the woman underneath the makeup,” they’re not saying they want to see your leg stubble and greasy bangs—they’re saying they want you to be better at hiding your maintenance routine.

I utterly, utterly love Lindy West. My sister, my bloke and I all cackled hysterically at her take-down of stupid guys who comment on their ladies’ beauty routines.

OK, you might think I’m ridiculous, but this woman’s videos have CHANGED MY HOUSE FOREVER.

Is it terrible that, rather than buying things from this Etsy store, I am using it as inspiration to make DIY book-based projects…?

OI!!! Edinburgh Vintage is having a SALE! There’s also a FINAL CLEARANCE section! Go buy pretty things and help me empty my spare room!


Zoe Margolis looking HAWT and calling publishers out on their bullshit.


Amy Poehler being a magical badass goddess of wisdom.


& finally, I love this. Who said Etsy sellers don’t have a sense of humour?

Have a great weekend!

*

You can also visit Read This Press for more poetry (and typewriter paraphernalia!). Alternatively, check out Edinburgh Vintage, our sister site. If you want to get in touch you can follow OneNightStanzas on Twitter, or email claire[at]onenightstanzas.com. I reply as swiftly as I can!

(Photo credit)